"Why are you surrounded by the largest crowd you'll ever again see in your life that consists of nothing but people who look exactly like you?"
KEITH OLBERMANN in his Special President's Day Comment on the Tea Party Movement
"CASEYDANCER" RESPONDS TO PL'S POST: "PUT ELIAS KOTEAS IN YOUR MOVIE, NOW!"
Here's Caseydancer:
"Oh hell yes. Put him in your movie then let me know if he needs a date to any awards ceremonies. ;)"
PL:
I hear you, CD!
"Oh hell yes. Put him in your movie then let me know if he needs a date to any awards ceremonies. ;)"
PL:
I hear you, CD!
"PUT ELIAS KOTEAS IN YOUR MOVIE, NOW!" PL: "OKAY, I WILL!!"
This is from "THE HOLLYWOOD REPORTER" last week, a piece entitled "Put Elias Koteas in your movie, now!" by one Jay A. Fernandez.
This is very exciting to me because not only is Elias a dear friend of mine, but this gifted actor is interested in starring in and directing a feature film of mine, called "THE FILE." In fact, we just had a table reading of the screenplay last week, directed by Elias, and it was exhilarating.
It is so gratifying to see the harmonious rhythm and evolution of a bright light in a fellow human being. I speak often about "generativity" - the need in a developing adult to give back to the world through the expression of one's natural soul gifts. It's a beautiful thing to witness.
Congratulations, Elias!!
Below is the piece on Elias by Fernandez, and below that is a brief scene from my screenplay, THE FILE.
Here's Fernandez:
This is decidedly random, but I’ve seen two movies recently that featured typically strong appearances by the mostly unsung Elias Koteas. I don’t know what it is, but I find this guy exhilarating to watch and wholeheartedly believe that he needs to be on screen as much as humanly possible.
So I hereby call for casting directors to bring him in on everything — comic book villains, romantic leads, action roles, miserable dramas, pornos, whatever. Get him in the movie. Do it now.
At Sundance two weeks ago, I was suffering through “The Killer Inside Me” when Koteas popped up as one of the few relatable characters — a guy who sees through the charming bullshit of Casey Affleck’s disturbed killer. He’s the kind of actor that lives so close to the skin of the character that he gives off those blurry heatwaves you see above a hot blacktop.
And then yesterday morning I was in a screening of Martin Scorsese’s “Shutter Island” on the Paramount lot and — whoa — there’s Koteas again. It’s only one scene, and he’s in some gnarly makeup, but I was so psyched to see his probing eyes and malicious grin.
Anyway, we all know how versatile he is, how he sizzled as the seductive Vaughan in David Cronenberg’s “Crash” and as the terribly conflicted captain in Terrence Malick’s “The Thin Red Line” and his supporting roles in Fincher’s “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” and “Zodiac.”
He’s one of those rare actors — I’m thinking of Joe Morton, or David Strathairn — who classes up any movie he’s in, no matter how crappy it is or how little he’s in it.
So: Elias Koteas. Put him in your fucking movie. Please.
Here's a scene from THE FILE:
INT. KIMBERLY’S OFFICE - LITTLE LATER
Drew is in his position on the couch. He is wearing an expensive-looking, blue 3-piece suit. Kimberly is looking a little uneasy in her chair. The little hand-held tape recorder is on. They are already into the session.
DREW
So, I don’t know. I don’t feel good about it, but I don’t feel totally bad about it either.
(beat)
My work life is very stressful, even though I love what I do.
(beat)
Well, I don’t know if I actually love what I do.
He hears Kimberly tapping her pen on the edge of the book.
DREW (cont’d)
You nervous or something today?
KIMBERLY
(startled)
What? No. Continue.
DREW
It’s stressful, my work. I guess maybe yours is, too, huh? Well, I don’t know about you, but for me, sex is the tonic, the stress-reliever. Especially good sex for good sex’s sake. For fun, you know? No questions asked, no strings, no emotional baggage...
KIMBERLY
Why can’t you have that with a woman who isn’t a... professional?
DREW
Hey, I’d love to meet a woman naturally who feels that way about sex...
KIMBERLY
Lois...
DREW
No. Lois is not the woman we’re talking about, and she’s not ever going to be. We’ve been over this.
(beat)
Anyway, even if I ever did meet that woman, it’d be tricky, wouldn’t it? I’d have to know that she’d be able to maintain our confidentiality.
Kimberly fidgets nervously. He turns his head and looks at her. He notices the book and loose papers.
DREW (cont’d)
Hey, what'd'you lose my file or something?
He leans up on his elbows, sizing her up.
KIMBERLY
(trying to compose herself)
Of course not. I left it home last night. I was just reviewing your case.
DREW
(suspicious)
Really?
(beat)
I was your bedtime reading, huh?
She just smiles slightly, not taking the bait.
DREW (cont’d)
Well, I know you won’t tell me if you live with anyone, or whatever, but I hope it’s not where someone else can read it.
KIMBERLY
No. Definitely not. Don’t worry.
DREW
Don’t worry? That’s a first from you.
She just looks at him. He seems to be lost in thought for a moment.
This is very exciting to me because not only is Elias a dear friend of mine, but this gifted actor is interested in starring in and directing a feature film of mine, called "THE FILE." In fact, we just had a table reading of the screenplay last week, directed by Elias, and it was exhilarating.
It is so gratifying to see the harmonious rhythm and evolution of a bright light in a fellow human being. I speak often about "generativity" - the need in a developing adult to give back to the world through the expression of one's natural soul gifts. It's a beautiful thing to witness.
Congratulations, Elias!!
Below is the piece on Elias by Fernandez, and below that is a brief scene from my screenplay, THE FILE.
Here's Fernandez:
This is decidedly random, but I’ve seen two movies recently that featured typically strong appearances by the mostly unsung Elias Koteas. I don’t know what it is, but I find this guy exhilarating to watch and wholeheartedly believe that he needs to be on screen as much as humanly possible.
So I hereby call for casting directors to bring him in on everything — comic book villains, romantic leads, action roles, miserable dramas, pornos, whatever. Get him in the movie. Do it now.
At Sundance two weeks ago, I was suffering through “The Killer Inside Me” when Koteas popped up as one of the few relatable characters — a guy who sees through the charming bullshit of Casey Affleck’s disturbed killer. He’s the kind of actor that lives so close to the skin of the character that he gives off those blurry heatwaves you see above a hot blacktop.
And then yesterday morning I was in a screening of Martin Scorsese’s “Shutter Island” on the Paramount lot and — whoa — there’s Koteas again. It’s only one scene, and he’s in some gnarly makeup, but I was so psyched to see his probing eyes and malicious grin.
Anyway, we all know how versatile he is, how he sizzled as the seductive Vaughan in David Cronenberg’s “Crash” and as the terribly conflicted captain in Terrence Malick’s “The Thin Red Line” and his supporting roles in Fincher’s “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” and “Zodiac.”
He’s one of those rare actors — I’m thinking of Joe Morton, or David Strathairn — who classes up any movie he’s in, no matter how crappy it is or how little he’s in it.
So: Elias Koteas. Put him in your fucking movie. Please.
Here's a scene from THE FILE:
INT. KIMBERLY’S OFFICE - LITTLE LATER
Drew is in his position on the couch. He is wearing an expensive-looking, blue 3-piece suit. Kimberly is looking a little uneasy in her chair. The little hand-held tape recorder is on. They are already into the session.
DREW
So, I don’t know. I don’t feel good about it, but I don’t feel totally bad about it either.
(beat)
My work life is very stressful, even though I love what I do.
(beat)
Well, I don’t know if I actually love what I do.
He hears Kimberly tapping her pen on the edge of the book.
DREW (cont’d)
You nervous or something today?
KIMBERLY
(startled)
What? No. Continue.
DREW
It’s stressful, my work. I guess maybe yours is, too, huh? Well, I don’t know about you, but for me, sex is the tonic, the stress-reliever. Especially good sex for good sex’s sake. For fun, you know? No questions asked, no strings, no emotional baggage...
KIMBERLY
Why can’t you have that with a woman who isn’t a... professional?
DREW
Hey, I’d love to meet a woman naturally who feels that way about sex...
KIMBERLY
Lois...
DREW
No. Lois is not the woman we’re talking about, and she’s not ever going to be. We’ve been over this.
(beat)
Anyway, even if I ever did meet that woman, it’d be tricky, wouldn’t it? I’d have to know that she’d be able to maintain our confidentiality.
Kimberly fidgets nervously. He turns his head and looks at her. He notices the book and loose papers.
DREW (cont’d)
Hey, what'd'you lose my file or something?
He leans up on his elbows, sizing her up.
KIMBERLY
(trying to compose herself)
Of course not. I left it home last night. I was just reviewing your case.
DREW
(suspicious)
Really?
(beat)
I was your bedtime reading, huh?
She just smiles slightly, not taking the bait.
DREW (cont’d)
Well, I know you won’t tell me if you live with anyone, or whatever, but I hope it’s not where someone else can read it.
KIMBERLY
No. Definitely not. Don’t worry.
DREW
Don’t worry? That’s a first from you.
She just looks at him. He seems to be lost in thought for a moment.
VALENTINE'S DAY FOR CHEATERS!!
There's a piece entitled Don't Be My Valentine, by Tracy Quan, on THE DAILY BEAST this weekend that starts out with this:
"Cheating on your spouse? Sleeping with the boss? Seeing a hooker? A Valentine's Day survival guide for people with complicated love lives."
What follows in Quan's article is a snappy, tongue-in-cheek, albeit shallow list of what to do for Valentine's Day in a number of precarious situations that so many people find themselves in today (see above). You can read the whole piece HERE.
But what is worth noting to me is that extramarital dalliances are so common that it's not only okay to make fun of the pervasive reality of the the lack of marital bliss, but it also fun to joke about the so-called "collateral damage" of "cheating," and to refer to the people who indulge in the activity as simply having "complicated love lives."
What gives?
Well, you can anticipate a lot what I'm going to say if you've been keeping up here on the FPL blog, right?
You know, I'm going to say that most people enter into marriage or relationships with dysfunctional and suspect motives and intentions, like to fulfill images and/or dependency needs left unmet from childhood. I'm going to say that contractual monogamy is a function of fear, not love. And of course, I'm emphatically going to say that a vibrant relationship must include love, Eros and sex, and in this case two outta three is bad! I'm going to say again that "staying together for the kids" is really bad for the kids. And so on.
Regarding the "cheating" issue, well it depends. I have found many times with patients that I work with in therapy that it is a good diagnostic sign when someone in a relationship without Eros or sex has an affair. Of course, feeling the need to sneak around isn't a measure of a healthy psyche, but at least the "cheater" in question hasn't given up on life's most necessary elements.
Love isn't complicated, folks. But it is powerful, and because our egos have taken over as captains of our emotional ships, we resist letting the tidal wave of Eros sweep us into the unknown land of blissful union with another.
So, there it is, another not-so-romantic Valentine's message from PL on FPL, but you know what? Real love, Eros and sex beats romance every time.
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!
"Cheating on your spouse? Sleeping with the boss? Seeing a hooker? A Valentine's Day survival guide for people with complicated love lives."
What follows in Quan's article is a snappy, tongue-in-cheek, albeit shallow list of what to do for Valentine's Day in a number of precarious situations that so many people find themselves in today (see above). You can read the whole piece HERE.
But what is worth noting to me is that extramarital dalliances are so common that it's not only okay to make fun of the pervasive reality of the the lack of marital bliss, but it also fun to joke about the so-called "collateral damage" of "cheating," and to refer to the people who indulge in the activity as simply having "complicated love lives."
What gives?
Well, you can anticipate a lot what I'm going to say if you've been keeping up here on the FPL blog, right?
You know, I'm going to say that most people enter into marriage or relationships with dysfunctional and suspect motives and intentions, like to fulfill images and/or dependency needs left unmet from childhood. I'm going to say that contractual monogamy is a function of fear, not love. And of course, I'm emphatically going to say that a vibrant relationship must include love, Eros and sex, and in this case two outta three is bad! I'm going to say again that "staying together for the kids" is really bad for the kids. And so on.
Regarding the "cheating" issue, well it depends. I have found many times with patients that I work with in therapy that it is a good diagnostic sign when someone in a relationship without Eros or sex has an affair. Of course, feeling the need to sneak around isn't a measure of a healthy psyche, but at least the "cheater" in question hasn't given up on life's most necessary elements.
Love isn't complicated, folks. But it is powerful, and because our egos have taken over as captains of our emotional ships, we resist letting the tidal wave of Eros sweep us into the unknown land of blissful union with another.
So, there it is, another not-so-romantic Valentine's message from PL on FPL, but you know what? Real love, Eros and sex beats romance every time.
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!
SCENE FROM EPISODE THREE - "RIDIN' THAT TRAIN" - OF PL'S TV SERIES: "CITY ROCK!"
This is one of my favorite scenes from my series for television, "CITY ROCK." Marva is a pregnant teen in a group home in which the heroine of City Rock, Jennie Silverman, a high-energy, Janis Joplin throw-back type, is the social worker. Darryl is a street-tough teen who thinks Marva is pregnant with his child and wants her out of the group home so he can control her. Jennie dices Darryl up here quite nicely in Episode 3: "Ridin' That Train."
INT. ST. THERESA’S GROUP HOME - DAY
The front door bell rings. A heavy-set, middle-aged woman, ANNIE, goes to answer it. She is a house mother at the group home. She opens the door and there stands a very hostile-looking Darryl.
ANNIE
Can I help you?
DARRYL
I come to pick up Marva.
ANNIE
Oh? Pick her up for what?
DARRYL
Just get her, okay?
MARVA (O.S.)
It’s okay, Annie.
Annie turns around to see Marva. Darryl slips inside.
MARVA
Darryl, I can’t leave. You got to go. Don’t make trouble for yourself.
DARRYL
Trouble for my-self?! I don’t think so. But there’s gonna be trouble for you and this... this damn lesbo hotel if you don’t get your stuff.
JENNIE (O.S.)
Sounds like we have a closet case of severe homosexual anxiety here, ladies.
Everyone turns to look at Jennie, who moves into the fray with an easy authority.
DARRYL
What’d she say?
JENNIE
I said, it sounds like your having a problem with your sexuality, Cool.
Darryl’s nostrils flare as he glares at Jennie, still not totally sure what she’s saying. Before he can speak, she keeps going.
JENNIE
Dig. I’m just playing with you.
(sidling up close to him)
Listen, Darryl... can I call you “D?” D, Marva has to stay here until we say she can go. That’s the deal, and the law. But I hear that you’re really into claiming your parental rights - very righteous of you. That’s the kind of brother I like! So, I just put in a call to the Bureau of Child Welfare and they insisted on having you pay for part of Marva’s room and board and expenses while she’s here - and check it out, we could really use the bread! And of course, they’ll want to fingerprint you so they can keep track of you down the road, you know, make sure you keep up those child support payments and all. You’re a real man to step up like this, Darryl. You don’t have a criminal record, by the way, do you? I mean, nothing that would show up from the fingerprints?
Darryl’s jaw is flapping up and down without words as he looks back and forth incredulously from Jennie to Marva.
JENNIE
Cool! So, you want to come in for a cup of joe or something and we’ll talk about signing you up to take birthing classes with Marva? I could tell you’re the kind of dude that would definitely want to be there when that beautiful, bloody little mess of a child comes poppin’ out of your honey's honey pot! Dig. It’s a sight!
Darryl, still flapping, confused as hell, looks at Annie, who is containing a smile, once more at Jennie, like she’s the devil, and then, he points his finger at Marva.
DARRYL
Later!
He leaves in a hurry. The women wait, then laugh together.
JENNIE
Dig!
INT. ST. THERESA’S GROUP HOME - DAY
The front door bell rings. A heavy-set, middle-aged woman, ANNIE, goes to answer it. She is a house mother at the group home. She opens the door and there stands a very hostile-looking Darryl.
ANNIE
Can I help you?
DARRYL
I come to pick up Marva.
ANNIE
Oh? Pick her up for what?
DARRYL
Just get her, okay?
MARVA (O.S.)
It’s okay, Annie.
Annie turns around to see Marva. Darryl slips inside.
MARVA
Darryl, I can’t leave. You got to go. Don’t make trouble for yourself.
DARRYL
Trouble for my-self?! I don’t think so. But there’s gonna be trouble for you and this... this damn lesbo hotel if you don’t get your stuff.
JENNIE (O.S.)
Sounds like we have a closet case of severe homosexual anxiety here, ladies.
Everyone turns to look at Jennie, who moves into the fray with an easy authority.
DARRYL
What’d she say?
JENNIE
I said, it sounds like your having a problem with your sexuality, Cool.
Darryl’s nostrils flare as he glares at Jennie, still not totally sure what she’s saying. Before he can speak, she keeps going.
JENNIE
Dig. I’m just playing with you.
(sidling up close to him)
Listen, Darryl... can I call you “D?” D, Marva has to stay here until we say she can go. That’s the deal, and the law. But I hear that you’re really into claiming your parental rights - very righteous of you. That’s the kind of brother I like! So, I just put in a call to the Bureau of Child Welfare and they insisted on having you pay for part of Marva’s room and board and expenses while she’s here - and check it out, we could really use the bread! And of course, they’ll want to fingerprint you so they can keep track of you down the road, you know, make sure you keep up those child support payments and all. You’re a real man to step up like this, Darryl. You don’t have a criminal record, by the way, do you? I mean, nothing that would show up from the fingerprints?
Darryl’s jaw is flapping up and down without words as he looks back and forth incredulously from Jennie to Marva.
JENNIE
Cool! So, you want to come in for a cup of joe or something and we’ll talk about signing you up to take birthing classes with Marva? I could tell you’re the kind of dude that would definitely want to be there when that beautiful, bloody little mess of a child comes poppin’ out of your honey's honey pot! Dig. It’s a sight!
Darryl, still flapping, confused as hell, looks at Annie, who is containing a smile, once more at Jennie, like she’s the devil, and then, he points his finger at Marva.
DARRYL
Later!
He leaves in a hurry. The women wait, then laugh together.
JENNIE
Dig!
FUNNY BUT TRUE FOLLOW-UP TO PL'S POINT ABOUT DANGEROUS BABY SOULS!
There's a good comic send-up on CRACKED.COM, entitled "6 SHOCKINGLY EVIL THINGS BABIES ARE CAPABLE OF", that serves as a good follow-up to my piece about the horrors of what happens when baby souls are left to their own devices. The piece humorously makes the correct point that babies don't begin to develop a conscience until four years old or later, and so likewise, a baby soul, even in an adult physical body, can similarly be without conscience.
For safety purposes, folks, I strongly suggest reading the SOUL AGE material, and committing it to memory, so you know who you're dealing with in your day-to-day life!
For safety purposes, folks, I strongly suggest reading the SOUL AGE material, and committing it to memory, so you know who you're dealing with in your day-to-day life!
NICE FOLLOW-UP FROM HARTKITT ON BRITTANY'S DEMISE, ETC.
Just a few points. Choosing to harm yourself in order to be a "star" does seem a rather asinine choice. On the other hand, acting is an art form in which you have to attain the approval of others in order to participate in your chosen art. To choose to not meet the cultural standard of beauty is to choose to not "do" your art.
Second, please don't assume that I am painting Ms. Murphy as a helpless victim. You make your choices and you live or die with them. However, the cultural imperative to be and look a certain way is extremely powerful and to just brush this force aside lightly is too careless. Being an accepted part of the pack is a core force driving the human psyche, not just an outgrowth of excessive narcissism. It doesn't make it any easier to ignore that force if what the pack wants is bad for us.
Third I could not agree more with you on the intertwined nature of the masculine and the feminine which is WHY in a story such as this it leaves out half the tale to not look at the role that our accepted images of what IS masculine and what is feminine play in our ability to ultimately grow into our own skins, both as a culture and as individuals.
And on that note, perhaps I should go eat some chocolate.
Second, please don't assume that I am painting Ms. Murphy as a helpless victim. You make your choices and you live or die with them. However, the cultural imperative to be and look a certain way is extremely powerful and to just brush this force aside lightly is too careless. Being an accepted part of the pack is a core force driving the human psyche, not just an outgrowth of excessive narcissism. It doesn't make it any easier to ignore that force if what the pack wants is bad for us.
Third I could not agree more with you on the intertwined nature of the masculine and the feminine which is WHY in a story such as this it leaves out half the tale to not look at the role that our accepted images of what IS masculine and what is feminine play in our ability to ultimately grow into our own skins, both as a culture and as individuals.
And on that note, perhaps I should go eat some chocolate.
AN IMPASSIONED COMMENT FROM "HARTKITT" ON PL'S: "THERE ARE NO 'NATURAL CAUSES' FOR THE DEATH OF A 32-YEAR OLD"/PL RESPONDS
Here's Hartkitt:
My instant take on this tragedy after looking at pictures of Brittany Murphy was that she was, like most TV and movie stars WHO ARE WOMEN all bones and stress. She has that look that so many actresses have of distended tendons and skeletal structure way too close to the surface. And yes, it may take a lot of drugs to get that look.
Women who start out looking "normal" slowly shrink up to dessicated wraiths to maintain the thinness required to be a star. Recent pictures of Sandra Bullock, for example, are painful to behold. It's almost a waste of time to even say it anymore, but our cultural standard for womens beauty is moving more and more towards a painfully thin look and actresses have to maintain it if they want to work. Maintaining a lifetime of partial starvation probably requires a lot of manipulation, drugs included.
Now, you can take as written here a general tirade on how keeping women thin and childlike is a way of depriving of them of perceived and actual power in life. If you spend a huge portion of your mental energy on being unnaturally thin then a) you don't have that energy for other things b) you're too wiped out from starvation to have energy for other things and c) you are, in effect saying that the body you live in is BADBADBAD and needs to be gotten rid of. How can this be empowering?
It seems almost impossible to fight against this cultural perception that a normal female body is not fat when all we see on TV, in movies and magazines is women who have every piece of fat removed from their bodies. The best I can do is point out over and over to my daughters that what they are seeing is NOT the norm and most likely not healthy as I did when we read of Brittany Murphy's death. Case in point.
Anyway, my point is that there was a reason she was taking all those drugs and had a weakened immune system and being bone thin could not have helped and may have been a causal factor. While feminism as such doesn't play a massive role in this blog it seems evident that for women, as part of accepting all of oneself, of giving oneself "full permission" to live giving permission to the parts of our bodies that aren't rock hard and bony plays a part.
Once again, don't get me started...
Here's PL:
Good to hear from you, Hartkitt. I understand your strong feelings about this, and at one level, I agree with all of what you are saying. I would add, however, that this is a collective and individual pathology at play here, and so in the truest sense, there are no simple or pure victims. You use a phrase like "required to be a star" as if there were no choice for said star but to decimate her body. "No" is one of the most empowering words in the English language, and if one puts one's "stardom" over one's physical, mental and emotional well-being, then somewhere there has been a choice made to say "Yes" to the narcissism rampant in our culture, especially in certain industries.
Full Permission Living is about self-love and self-acceptance, yes, and trusting in one's first nature. As such, feminism or any "ism" doesn't play a "massive role" on this blog, because in the Yin and Yang of it all, the masculine and feminine are equal and inextricably intertwined essential aspects of All That Is, the essence of which is love.
Thanks, HK!
My instant take on this tragedy after looking at pictures of Brittany Murphy was that she was, like most TV and movie stars WHO ARE WOMEN all bones and stress. She has that look that so many actresses have of distended tendons and skeletal structure way too close to the surface. And yes, it may take a lot of drugs to get that look.
Women who start out looking "normal" slowly shrink up to dessicated wraiths to maintain the thinness required to be a star. Recent pictures of Sandra Bullock, for example, are painful to behold. It's almost a waste of time to even say it anymore, but our cultural standard for womens beauty is moving more and more towards a painfully thin look and actresses have to maintain it if they want to work. Maintaining a lifetime of partial starvation probably requires a lot of manipulation, drugs included.
Now, you can take as written here a general tirade on how keeping women thin and childlike is a way of depriving of them of perceived and actual power in life. If you spend a huge portion of your mental energy on being unnaturally thin then a) you don't have that energy for other things b) you're too wiped out from starvation to have energy for other things and c) you are, in effect saying that the body you live in is BADBADBAD and needs to be gotten rid of. How can this be empowering?
It seems almost impossible to fight against this cultural perception that a normal female body is not fat when all we see on TV, in movies and magazines is women who have every piece of fat removed from their bodies. The best I can do is point out over and over to my daughters that what they are seeing is NOT the norm and most likely not healthy as I did when we read of Brittany Murphy's death. Case in point.
Anyway, my point is that there was a reason she was taking all those drugs and had a weakened immune system and being bone thin could not have helped and may have been a causal factor. While feminism as such doesn't play a massive role in this blog it seems evident that for women, as part of accepting all of oneself, of giving oneself "full permission" to live giving permission to the parts of our bodies that aren't rock hard and bony plays a part.
Once again, don't get me started...
Here's PL:
Good to hear from you, Hartkitt. I understand your strong feelings about this, and at one level, I agree with all of what you are saying. I would add, however, that this is a collective and individual pathology at play here, and so in the truest sense, there are no simple or pure victims. You use a phrase like "required to be a star" as if there were no choice for said star but to decimate her body. "No" is one of the most empowering words in the English language, and if one puts one's "stardom" over one's physical, mental and emotional well-being, then somewhere there has been a choice made to say "Yes" to the narcissism rampant in our culture, especially in certain industries.
Full Permission Living is about self-love and self-acceptance, yes, and trusting in one's first nature. As such, feminism or any "ism" doesn't play a "massive role" on this blog, because in the Yin and Yang of it all, the masculine and feminine are equal and inextricably intertwined essential aspects of All That Is, the essence of which is love.
Thanks, HK!
SCENE FROM EPISODE TWO - "SHOOTING STARS" - OF PL'S TV SERIES: "CITY ROCK!"
This episode brings in an all too familiar dramatized headline from the early 1980's, a time when the crime rate in NYC was at an all-time high, as were the tensions between the white powers that were and people of color living in the city. The finale to this episode is explosive and heartbreaking, as so many of those days were back then.
Here's a short scene from "SHOOTING STARS":
EXT. STREET IN HARLEM - NIGHT
OFFICER OTHA PRESCOTT, our proud rookie cop and center fielder, and 2 older WHITE COPS are hiding in the shadows, watching a middle-aged BLACK MAN about to enter a tenement building, looking around anxiously.
COP ONE
(whispering)
That’s him. That’s definitely him.
COP TWO
Yeah. Let’s take him.
OTHA
I-I can’t see his face. You sure that’s him? How can you tell?
COP ONE
Experience, rookie. Stay with us and be ready.
They move on the man.
COP ONE
FREEZE! POLICE! TURN AROUND!
The man turns around, one hand fumbling in his pocket. He pulls something out.
COP TWO
HE’S GOT A GUN!
Suddenly, the cops begin firing, including the frightened Otha. A hail of bullets topple the man over. The cops rush over, guns pointed.
COP ONE
Where’s the gun? Find the gun!
COP TWO opens the man’s hand to find a key case. He looks frantically around, searching the ground and then the man.
COP TWO
I can’t find it!
COP ONE
You said he had a gun!
COP TWO
He did. He did! I saw it.
COP ONE takes the key case and looks at his two partners.
COP ONE
FUCK!
OTHA
(wide-eyed and shaking)
H-he’s...dead. W-we killed him.
We see the riddled body of the dead man, his blood spreading out on the stoop beneath him.
COP ONE
Hey. HEY! KID! Take it easy. Believe me, this guy’ll turn out to be a criminal, one way or another. It happens. We’ll make the report. We’ll tell you what to say. Be cool.
Otha is in shock.
COP TWO
Shit!
Here's a short scene from "SHOOTING STARS":
EXT. STREET IN HARLEM - NIGHT
OFFICER OTHA PRESCOTT, our proud rookie cop and center fielder, and 2 older WHITE COPS are hiding in the shadows, watching a middle-aged BLACK MAN about to enter a tenement building, looking around anxiously.
COP ONE
(whispering)
That’s him. That’s definitely him.
COP TWO
Yeah. Let’s take him.
OTHA
I-I can’t see his face. You sure that’s him? How can you tell?
COP ONE
Experience, rookie. Stay with us and be ready.
They move on the man.
COP ONE
FREEZE! POLICE! TURN AROUND!
The man turns around, one hand fumbling in his pocket. He pulls something out.
COP TWO
HE’S GOT A GUN!
Suddenly, the cops begin firing, including the frightened Otha. A hail of bullets topple the man over. The cops rush over, guns pointed.
COP ONE
Where’s the gun? Find the gun!
COP TWO opens the man’s hand to find a key case. He looks frantically around, searching the ground and then the man.
COP TWO
I can’t find it!
COP ONE
You said he had a gun!
COP TWO
He did. He did! I saw it.
COP ONE takes the key case and looks at his two partners.
COP ONE
FUCK!
OTHA
(wide-eyed and shaking)
H-he’s...dead. W-we killed him.
We see the riddled body of the dead man, his blood spreading out on the stoop beneath him.
COP ONE
Hey. HEY! KID! Take it easy. Believe me, this guy’ll turn out to be a criminal, one way or another. It happens. We’ll make the report. We’ll tell you what to say. Be cool.
Otha is in shock.
COP TWO
Shit!
"LOFF56 RESPONDS TO PL'S "THERE ARE NO 'NATURAL CAUSES' OF DEATH FOR A 32-YEAR OLD!"/PL RESPONDS!
Here's LOFF56:
I definitely agree with the principal of what you're both saying - that drug companies and doctors alike are nefariously putting us at undue risk for their own personal gain. But by definition I think the coroner was right that it was an accidental death. (Although I admit the possibility exists that all the facts weren't presented and there was more to it than what's been made public).
An accident is the societal justification of a statistically inevitable negative result of a risk. (In an absolute sense there should be no such thing as an "accident" - everything happens for a reason.) It's just that the degree of how "accidental" an event is is proportional to our judgment of the value of the positive benefits associated with that risk. It's staggering the number of people that die in automobile accidents each year. Yet most of us don't think twice about getting into a car - and, by the way, very rarely do we blame those accidents on the auto industry.
It's all about statistics. If .1% of drivers die in a car accident this year, when it does happen it's not a stretch to call it an accident. If 1% of people die of an adverse affect to a prescription drug, it's still statistically an accident when it does happen. Unless of course you don't believe at all in any benefit of prescription drugs, then in that case increasing your risk of death by 1% for no apparent benefit disqualifies a negative result from being considered an accident. But it would be the same for someone who say doesn't believe in the benefits of driving a car, to them adding a .1% risk of death is just foolish.
I realize that there may be some other factors in this particular case such as intentional overdose, which in my analogy I guess would be like driving 120 miles an hour at night in the rain - if you die, than yes, it's your own damn fault. Or maybe negligence on the doctors part, perhaps not noticing the conflicting circumstances, I guess that would be like a mechanic failing to fix your brakes correctly. In both cases there is someone to blame for the accident. But in both of those cases you can't blame the drug company or the car company for that specific result.
I'm not trying to absolve the drug companies in any way, personally I think there are aspects of what they do that reach into the realm of what the tobacco companies do. And the more we learn about the drugs they produce the more the risk to benefit ratio changes. But they're no where near 100% risk and 0% benefit that the tobacco companies have managed to accomplish. There are still tangible benefits they provide. Penicillin would be one, however a cure for Restless Leg Syndrome - not so much. When they start adding risk with no tangible benefit, that's when they become reckless and irresponsible. But I don't think we should tear down the whole industry, but for sure we need to beat the greed out of them like there's no tomorrow!!
Here's PL:
Well, I know we've had this discussion before on this blog, the one bad apple/don't throw the baby out with the bath water debate. But you know what, when there's enough bad apples in a particular bunch on a regular basis, you stop going to that orchard. I think that the pharmaceutical industry has reached the tobacco industry's low bar. I mean, hey, cigarettes help reduce anxiety for some people in the short run while helping them create cancer, right? And cars? Yes, actually, cars are pretty much an insane, archaic mode of transportation that at this point does more harm than good en masse.
Big Pharma has gone so far beyond a few potentially useful antibiotics or analgesics to a place where they make Frank Lucas, the heroin kingpin made famous in "American Gangster" look like not much more than a benign hipster. Sorry, L56, I can't let 'em off the hook that easily. At best, if it's not technically homicide, then Brittany's doctors and pharmacists were complicit in her suicide.
I definitely agree with the principal of what you're both saying - that drug companies and doctors alike are nefariously putting us at undue risk for their own personal gain. But by definition I think the coroner was right that it was an accidental death. (Although I admit the possibility exists that all the facts weren't presented and there was more to it than what's been made public).
An accident is the societal justification of a statistically inevitable negative result of a risk. (In an absolute sense there should be no such thing as an "accident" - everything happens for a reason.) It's just that the degree of how "accidental" an event is is proportional to our judgment of the value of the positive benefits associated with that risk. It's staggering the number of people that die in automobile accidents each year. Yet most of us don't think twice about getting into a car - and, by the way, very rarely do we blame those accidents on the auto industry.
It's all about statistics. If .1% of drivers die in a car accident this year, when it does happen it's not a stretch to call it an accident. If 1% of people die of an adverse affect to a prescription drug, it's still statistically an accident when it does happen. Unless of course you don't believe at all in any benefit of prescription drugs, then in that case increasing your risk of death by 1% for no apparent benefit disqualifies a negative result from being considered an accident. But it would be the same for someone who say doesn't believe in the benefits of driving a car, to them adding a .1% risk of death is just foolish.
I realize that there may be some other factors in this particular case such as intentional overdose, which in my analogy I guess would be like driving 120 miles an hour at night in the rain - if you die, than yes, it's your own damn fault. Or maybe negligence on the doctors part, perhaps not noticing the conflicting circumstances, I guess that would be like a mechanic failing to fix your brakes correctly. In both cases there is someone to blame for the accident. But in both of those cases you can't blame the drug company or the car company for that specific result.
I'm not trying to absolve the drug companies in any way, personally I think there are aspects of what they do that reach into the realm of what the tobacco companies do. And the more we learn about the drugs they produce the more the risk to benefit ratio changes. But they're no where near 100% risk and 0% benefit that the tobacco companies have managed to accomplish. There are still tangible benefits they provide. Penicillin would be one, however a cure for Restless Leg Syndrome - not so much. When they start adding risk with no tangible benefit, that's when they become reckless and irresponsible. But I don't think we should tear down the whole industry, but for sure we need to beat the greed out of them like there's no tomorrow!!
Here's PL:
Well, I know we've had this discussion before on this blog, the one bad apple/don't throw the baby out with the bath water debate. But you know what, when there's enough bad apples in a particular bunch on a regular basis, you stop going to that orchard. I think that the pharmaceutical industry has reached the tobacco industry's low bar. I mean, hey, cigarettes help reduce anxiety for some people in the short run while helping them create cancer, right? And cars? Yes, actually, cars are pretty much an insane, archaic mode of transportation that at this point does more harm than good en masse.
Big Pharma has gone so far beyond a few potentially useful antibiotics or analgesics to a place where they make Frank Lucas, the heroin kingpin made famous in "American Gangster" look like not much more than a benign hipster. Sorry, L56, I can't let 'em off the hook that easily. At best, if it's not technically homicide, then Brittany's doctors and pharmacists were complicit in her suicide.
"AUNTLORI" RESPONDS TO PL'S "THERE ARE NO 'NATURAL CAUSES' OF DEATH FOR A 32-YEAR OLD!!"
Here's Auntlori:
"The primary cause of the death was community acquired pneumonia, with contributing factors of iron deficiency anemia and 'multiple drug intoxication," according to the Los Angeles County coroner's office.
The death was ruled accidental.
This passage is from the coroner's report on Brittany Murphy's death. How does "multiple drug intoxication" get ruled "accidental"?! IF she was not abusing the "prescription" medications she took, then who is responsible for providing her with a toxic combination of prescription drugs? Any scenario here is anything but accidental.
Here's PL:
Couldn't agree with you more, Auntlori. One of the biggest scandals of our lifetime, after all of these nefarious financial shenanigans are dealt with, will be the deadly and deceitful practices of our mainstream medical-pharmaceutical industry.
Thanks for the post!
"The primary cause of the death was community acquired pneumonia, with contributing factors of iron deficiency anemia and 'multiple drug intoxication," according to the Los Angeles County coroner's office.
The death was ruled accidental.
This passage is from the coroner's report on Brittany Murphy's death. How does "multiple drug intoxication" get ruled "accidental"?! IF she was not abusing the "prescription" medications she took, then who is responsible for providing her with a toxic combination of prescription drugs? Any scenario here is anything but accidental.
Here's PL:
Couldn't agree with you more, Auntlori. One of the biggest scandals of our lifetime, after all of these nefarious financial shenanigans are dealt with, will be the deadly and deceitful practices of our mainstream medical-pharmaceutical industry.
Thanks for the post!
REPOST: LOFF56 RESPONDS TO PL'S "RAISING A CHILD? HIRE A CARPENTER!"/PL RESPONDS!
Here's LOFF56:
Some other things you need a license for:
(not necessarily in all states or cities)
Fishing
Hunting
Owning a gun
Owning a dog
Breeding dogs
Driving
Driving a Scooter
Getting married
Being an electrician
Being a plumber
Being an architect
Selling liquor
Being a Financial Advisor
Things you need a Permit for:
Protesting
Painting your house
Using a public park
Learning to Drive
Playing music in public
Selling Pretzels
Playing softball
Taking your bike on a Train!! LOL
I'm sure there are hundreds if not thousands more, but these are pretty silly.
That's right, you need a license to breed a dog but not a human!!!
Here's PL:
THANKS, L56! By the way, I often recommend to those who need further training in parenting skills to watch "The Dog Whisperer!"
Some other things you need a license for:
(not necessarily in all states or cities)
Fishing
Hunting
Owning a gun
Owning a dog
Breeding dogs
Driving
Driving a Scooter
Getting married
Being an electrician
Being a plumber
Being an architect
Selling liquor
Being a Financial Advisor
Things you need a Permit for:
Protesting
Painting your house
Using a public park
Learning to Drive
Playing music in public
Selling Pretzels
Playing softball
Taking your bike on a Train!! LOL
I'm sure there are hundreds if not thousands more, but these are pretty silly.
That's right, you need a license to breed a dog but not a human!!!
Here's PL:
THANKS, L56! By the way, I often recommend to those who need further training in parenting skills to watch "The Dog Whisperer!"
FINAL SCENE FROM THE "CITY ROCK" PILOT EPISODE
This moment from the script of my City Rock TV series pilot, "While You're Busy Making Other Plans," in which the main character, "FRANK CELLO," is confronted by the spirit of a street kid who was killed on Frank's watch, is one of my favorites. The idea of making Frank's conscience manifest as the spirit of that boy was inspired by Paul Michael Glaser, who directed the recent reading of the episode at the Cherry Lane Theatre. An interesting tidbit - the reading took place on December 8, the anniversary of John Lennon's death. Lennon's murder figures prominently in the story, but I was not aware that our reading was scheduled, serendipitously, for that particular night.
Here's the final scene:
EXT. NYC STREET - LATE EVENING
Frank is walking, lost. He arrives to the Gramercy Park Softball League playing field and goes over to sit on a bench. He looks out onto the dark asphalt schoolyard, lit up only by the street lights.
YOUNG GUY (O.S.)
Hey, man, your team was tough.
FRANK
What? What are you doing here?
YOUNG GUY
What are you doing here?
FRANK
Look, what do you want?
YOUNG GUY
What do you want?
FRANK
Tonight is not a good night for questions.
YOUNG GUY
Can’t have answers without askin’ questions.
Silence for a long moment.
YOUNG GUY (cont’d)
Remember that night John was killed?
Frank remembers and looks pained.
YOUNG GUY (cont’d)
Four months ago tonight. That was not a good night.
FRANK
Don’t remind me.
YOUNG GUY
Why’d you name your team after me?
FRANK
I don’t know. It just came to me.
YOUNG GUY/CITY ROCK
I like that you did that.
FRANK
You never told me your real name.
CITY ROCK
Nobody has a real name on the street.
(beat)
Maybe it was his time, you know? John. I wasn’t into the Beatles. Kinda cool, though, that we checked out on the same night.
FRANK
Cool? Not exactly.
CITY ROCK
You couldn’t save me, Frank.
Frank starts to object.
CITY ROCK (cont’d)
No. I mean you couldn’t save me. You can’t save anybody, Frank. That’s what I’ve been tryin’ to tell you, but you don’t want to hear it.
Frank looks at the boy, then hangs his head for a long moment.
FRANK
Then, what am I doing? What’s the point? What’s my point?
CITY ROCK
What would Kirk say? You just know what you gotta do and you do it.
FRANK
You know Kirk?
CITY ROCK
(smiling)
Yeah, we just met. Hey, maybe you just keep going, Frank. These are crazy times comin’ up. This decade, I got a feelin’ a lot of people are gonna split. But what you’re tryin’ to do, it still matters.
Frank looks out at the ballfield under the moonlight, then looks back at the boy... but he isn’t there.
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. CENTRAL PARK - SAME MOMENT
We see a crowd of people mourning, holding a candlelight vigil in Central Park in what will soon become Strawberry Fields.
DISSOLVE BACK TO:
EXT. GPSL PLAYING FIELD - SAME MOMENT
Frank walks over to home plate, stands there, looking out onto the field, then heads for home.
FADE TO BLACK.
Here's the final scene:
EXT. NYC STREET - LATE EVENING
Frank is walking, lost. He arrives to the Gramercy Park Softball League playing field and goes over to sit on a bench. He looks out onto the dark asphalt schoolyard, lit up only by the street lights.
YOUNG GUY (O.S.)
Hey, man, your team was tough.
FRANK
What? What are you doing here?
YOUNG GUY
What are you doing here?
FRANK
Look, what do you want?
YOUNG GUY
What do you want?
FRANK
Tonight is not a good night for questions.
YOUNG GUY
Can’t have answers without askin’ questions.
Silence for a long moment.
YOUNG GUY (cont’d)
Remember that night John was killed?
Frank remembers and looks pained.
YOUNG GUY (cont’d)
Four months ago tonight. That was not a good night.
FRANK
Don’t remind me.
YOUNG GUY
Why’d you name your team after me?
FRANK
I don’t know. It just came to me.
YOUNG GUY/CITY ROCK
I like that you did that.
FRANK
You never told me your real name.
CITY ROCK
Nobody has a real name on the street.
(beat)
Maybe it was his time, you know? John. I wasn’t into the Beatles. Kinda cool, though, that we checked out on the same night.
FRANK
Cool? Not exactly.
CITY ROCK
You couldn’t save me, Frank.
Frank starts to object.
CITY ROCK (cont’d)
No. I mean you couldn’t save me. You can’t save anybody, Frank. That’s what I’ve been tryin’ to tell you, but you don’t want to hear it.
Frank looks at the boy, then hangs his head for a long moment.
FRANK
Then, what am I doing? What’s the point? What’s my point?
CITY ROCK
What would Kirk say? You just know what you gotta do and you do it.
FRANK
You know Kirk?
CITY ROCK
(smiling)
Yeah, we just met. Hey, maybe you just keep going, Frank. These are crazy times comin’ up. This decade, I got a feelin’ a lot of people are gonna split. But what you’re tryin’ to do, it still matters.
Frank looks out at the ballfield under the moonlight, then looks back at the boy... but he isn’t there.
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. CENTRAL PARK - SAME MOMENT
We see a crowd of people mourning, holding a candlelight vigil in Central Park in what will soon become Strawberry Fields.
DISSOLVE BACK TO:
EXT. GPSL PLAYING FIELD - SAME MOMENT
Frank walks over to home plate, stands there, looking out onto the field, then heads for home.
FADE TO BLACK.
TODAY'S QUOTE!
"The physical mind is not designed to know how something is going to happen. It’s only designed to know how something is happening and has happened. It doesn’t have the ability to know how something is going to happen. The higher mind does that job."
DARRYL ANKAR ("BASHAR")
DARRYL ANKAR ("BASHAR")
TODAY'S POEM!
Kahlil Gibran on Love
When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams
as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.
Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.
But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say, "God is in my heart," but rather, "I am in the heart of God."
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.
When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams
as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.
Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.
But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say, "God is in my heart," but rather, "I am in the heart of God."
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.
TODAY'S QUOTE!
"No man is an island entire of itself; every man
is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
well as any manner of thy friends or of thine
own were; any man's death diminishes me,
because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee."
John Donne
is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
well as any manner of thy friends or of thine
own were; any man's death diminishes me,
because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee."
John Donne
SAD MOMS STRESS KIDS!
Below is a post I put up a couple of weeks ago referencing an article and a study demonstrating how the emotional state of mothers affects the brain development of their children. How parents' emotional lives affect the development of their offspring is obviously not a subject I've shied away from, and I've aroused the ire of many parents as a result.
Well, today comes another article and another study reporting that when parents are depressed or under stress, their suffering can leave a lasting mark on their children’s DNA — and not for the better. You can read the entire piece by Sharon Begley, entitled "How Stressed Parents Scar Their Kids," by clicking on the title.
Here's an excerpt and below is my previous post with links to other previous posts on this matter:
"When it comes to finding culprits for everything that’s wrong with us as children and even as adults, parents are everyone’s favorite default option. And why not? Decades of research in child development and psychology have linked maternal depression to children’s mental and physical illness as well as language and cognitive deficits, shown that when the parents’ marriage is riven by conflict children grow up to be emotionally insecure and have difficulty forming loving adult relationships, and found that when parents are under significant stress their kids are more likely to have behavior problems, to have difficulty handling stress, and to be at greater risk for mental illness. If there was any doubt about the power of this parental legacy, an upcoming study should dispel it: when parents are under emotional, financial, or other forms of stress, it can alter their children’s patterns of genetic activity at least through adolescence and perhaps longer. And since some of the altered genes shape brain development, the effects of parental stress might permanently wire themselves into children’s brains."
Well, as is so often the case, out comes a study this week entitled: "How Sad Moms Change a Child’s Brain: New research shows that children with depressed mothers can have enlarged amygdalas, the part of the brain responsible for emotional responses—and detecting threats."
I'm not looking to be right here, folks, I'm just fed up with the insidious partnership between the mainstream medical establishment, claiming that brain chemistry is unrelated causally from a child's environment, and parents who don't want to do the self-work necessary in order to qualify themselves for parenthood.
There's nothing disgraceful about acknowledging one's limitations and dysfunctions as parents. What is disgraceful is the denial and refusal to seek appropriate healing at the expense of our kids and society at large.
Well, today comes another article and another study reporting that when parents are depressed or under stress, their suffering can leave a lasting mark on their children’s DNA — and not for the better. You can read the entire piece by Sharon Begley, entitled "How Stressed Parents Scar Their Kids," by clicking on the title.
Here's an excerpt and below is my previous post with links to other previous posts on this matter:
"When it comes to finding culprits for everything that’s wrong with us as children and even as adults, parents are everyone’s favorite default option. And why not? Decades of research in child development and psychology have linked maternal depression to children’s mental and physical illness as well as language and cognitive deficits, shown that when the parents’ marriage is riven by conflict children grow up to be emotionally insecure and have difficulty forming loving adult relationships, and found that when parents are under significant stress their kids are more likely to have behavior problems, to have difficulty handling stress, and to be at greater risk for mental illness. If there was any doubt about the power of this parental legacy, an upcoming study should dispel it: when parents are under emotional, financial, or other forms of stress, it can alter their children’s patterns of genetic activity at least through adolescence and perhaps longer. And since some of the altered genes shape brain development, the effects of parental stress might permanently wire themselves into children’s brains."
Well, as is so often the case, out comes a study this week entitled: "How Sad Moms Change a Child’s Brain: New research shows that children with depressed mothers can have enlarged amygdalas, the part of the brain responsible for emotional responses—and detecting threats."
I'm not looking to be right here, folks, I'm just fed up with the insidious partnership between the mainstream medical establishment, claiming that brain chemistry is unrelated causally from a child's environment, and parents who don't want to do the self-work necessary in order to qualify themselves for parenthood.
There's nothing disgraceful about acknowledging one's limitations and dysfunctions as parents. What is disgraceful is the denial and refusal to seek appropriate healing at the expense of our kids and society at large.
JUST A LITTLE POLITICAL DIATRIBE ON A SUNDAY MORNING! INDULGE ME, OKAY?!
The Republican Party is nearly dead!
Barely intelligible, pseudo-political miscreants on the internet and FOX News want to fantasize that Scott Brown's win last week was an omen that stupidity was back in business, but Brown's election was the best thing to happen to President Obama and the Democrats since November 2008. Obama is coming out swinging as he always does, once he's on the ropes. (Think Ali's rope-a-dope.)
There's no "there" there in the GOP, no ideas, no direction, and most significantly, no intellect. The very notion that a drug-addled blowhard like Rush Limbaugh or a bi-polar clownshow like Glenn Beck could be the focal point of dialogue on the right says it all. George Will, David Brooks, even Joe Scarborough have become the fringe elements on the right because they actually think!
The right is all about costumes and bellicosity now, wearing tea bags on their hats while ranting about socialism, fascism and communism all in one breath, as if they had any idea what those terms actually meant. The mostly working class right wingnuts railed against health care reform, not even understanding that they were the ones who were most abused by the present system that feeds the beasts known as insurance and drug companies.
These folks are so behind the times and so unable to change that having a man of color as president terrifies them for no other reason than that he is... a man of color. They've actually started an all-white basketball league, for Christ's sake, to "get back to the fundamentals." (Think "fundamentalism," as in Pat Robertson, who decried that the devil is skulking around making deals and causing God to kill poor people.)
The pretenders to the ravaged right want you to forget George Bush, their brush-clearing hero for eight years, who's only true "mission accomplished" was to destroy our economy and our credibility in the world at large, after allowing the worst terrorist attack on American soil in history to occur and then waging a futile war against the wrong country in retaliation.
Now, the teabaggers say they are "independents," even though they're celebrating Brown's brief moment in the electoral sun as the second coming of... the Republican Party!
It's Sunday morning in America, folks. And it's taking a while to get over the hangover from the binge of stupidity and corruption we've endured. But believe it - Scott Brown's election was the beginning of the recovery.
Barely intelligible, pseudo-political miscreants on the internet and FOX News want to fantasize that Scott Brown's win last week was an omen that stupidity was back in business, but Brown's election was the best thing to happen to President Obama and the Democrats since November 2008. Obama is coming out swinging as he always does, once he's on the ropes. (Think Ali's rope-a-dope.)
There's no "there" there in the GOP, no ideas, no direction, and most significantly, no intellect. The very notion that a drug-addled blowhard like Rush Limbaugh or a bi-polar clownshow like Glenn Beck could be the focal point of dialogue on the right says it all. George Will, David Brooks, even Joe Scarborough have become the fringe elements on the right because they actually think!
The right is all about costumes and bellicosity now, wearing tea bags on their hats while ranting about socialism, fascism and communism all in one breath, as if they had any idea what those terms actually meant. The mostly working class right wingnuts railed against health care reform, not even understanding that they were the ones who were most abused by the present system that feeds the beasts known as insurance and drug companies.
These folks are so behind the times and so unable to change that having a man of color as president terrifies them for no other reason than that he is... a man of color. They've actually started an all-white basketball league, for Christ's sake, to "get back to the fundamentals." (Think "fundamentalism," as in Pat Robertson, who decried that the devil is skulking around making deals and causing God to kill poor people.)
The pretenders to the ravaged right want you to forget George Bush, their brush-clearing hero for eight years, who's only true "mission accomplished" was to destroy our economy and our credibility in the world at large, after allowing the worst terrorist attack on American soil in history to occur and then waging a futile war against the wrong country in retaliation.
Now, the teabaggers say they are "independents," even though they're celebrating Brown's brief moment in the electoral sun as the second coming of... the Republican Party!
It's Sunday morning in America, folks. And it's taking a while to get over the hangover from the binge of stupidity and corruption we've endured. But believe it - Scott Brown's election was the beginning of the recovery.
Thousands of dolphins block Somali pirates!!
I found this in my archives from last April. Nice.
BEIJING, April 14 (Xinhuanet) -- Thousands of dolphins blocked suspected Somali pirate ships when they were trying to attack Chinese merchant ships passing the Gulf of Aden, the China Radio International reported on Monday.
CLICK ON PICTURE
BEIJING, April 14 (Xinhuanet) -- Thousands of dolphins blocked suspected Somali pirate ships when they were trying to attack Chinese merchant ships passing the Gulf of Aden, the China Radio International reported on Monday.
CLICK ON PICTURE
IT MAY SEEM LIKE THINGS ARE GETTING WORSE, BUT PERHAPS THEY'RE GETTING BETTER!!
Today, it is eminently possible to follow the news about anything and everything, everywhere, at any time. In an instant, we can know when there is a natural or man-made disaster across the globe from where we are, or we can follow the inane, moment to moment tweets of a celebrity, politician or a friend traveling the world. We are exposed by cameras hidden in our IPhones and by the pictures and videos that can be spread around on YouTube literally like a virus. There are websites made in heaven (or hell) for both voyeurs and exhibitionists of any persuasion, and there are forums for voicing opinions (endlessly) on subjects both boringly mundane or exquisitely obscure.
All of this exposure of ourselves to ourselves can give one the impression that the world is really devolving. Corruption and deceit on such grand scales, wanton greed, violence, racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia... all seem rampant these days. The "captains of industry" seem more like drunken sailors on permanent shore leave than clever capitalists, while our political and religious leaders seem to be either in some kind of hypnotic stupor or maybe just downright demented, rather than the "best and the brightest."
Yet, I am reminded when considering the above of how the process of healing takes place on an individual basis in therapy. Very often when a patient starts really making progress and breaking through the confines of their character structures, things feel worse. The old festered emotions, suppressed since early childhood, begin emerging as a result of the breakthroughs. And along with the painful feelings come the traumatic memories and associations that inspired the suppression in the first place. As this congestion of thoughts and feelings is undone, the "infection" starts to comes out, and as anyone who's ever had the flu knows, when it starts breaking up and the globs of goo start releasing, it can get ugly.
So, maybe that explains a lot of what we're seeing lately, from Scott Brown to Glenn Beck, from Tea Baggers to Orly Taitz, and of course, everything on the free, public, lunatic asylum known as the Craigslist Political Forum!
Maybe it's all just snot!!
All of this exposure of ourselves to ourselves can give one the impression that the world is really devolving. Corruption and deceit on such grand scales, wanton greed, violence, racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia... all seem rampant these days. The "captains of industry" seem more like drunken sailors on permanent shore leave than clever capitalists, while our political and religious leaders seem to be either in some kind of hypnotic stupor or maybe just downright demented, rather than the "best and the brightest."
Yet, I am reminded when considering the above of how the process of healing takes place on an individual basis in therapy. Very often when a patient starts really making progress and breaking through the confines of their character structures, things feel worse. The old festered emotions, suppressed since early childhood, begin emerging as a result of the breakthroughs. And along with the painful feelings come the traumatic memories and associations that inspired the suppression in the first place. As this congestion of thoughts and feelings is undone, the "infection" starts to comes out, and as anyone who's ever had the flu knows, when it starts breaking up and the globs of goo start releasing, it can get ugly.
So, maybe that explains a lot of what we're seeing lately, from Scott Brown to Glenn Beck, from Tea Baggers to Orly Taitz, and of course, everything on the free, public, lunatic asylum known as the Craigslist Political Forum!
Maybe it's all just snot!!
LOFF56 on PL's: "POLITICAL LEADERS CANNOT HEAL THE SOUL OF AMERICA!"/PL RESPONDS WITH THE BIG BOOK!!
Here's LOFF56:
See... yet again... I said this the day after he got elected, and I'll keep saying it again, why we ever thought that Obama was going to be a liberal president is just beyond logic and quite frankly the facts. We deluded ourselves into believing that. If we're upset that he's not meeting our expectations, quite frankly it's because our expectations were way off the mark!!
As I wrote then, and I'm still writing now, every platform that he stood on was a centrist one. No Gay marriage, continuing the bailouts, continuing the wars, etc... Even healthcare reform! Let's be real, a liberal solution to healthcare would be a Universal Healthcare system. Even the House bill which so far is the most left leaning, barely holds onto a "Public Option". Have we completely lost our perspective. "Optional" is SO far from "Universal"!!!
Thinking that Obama was gonna' be like a Kennedy or a Dennis Kucinich is just plain delusional.
The irony for me in all of this is that I like to consider myself a centrist, (leaning to the left for sure though). But having a centrist in the White House with the stubborn obstructionist Right Wing in the minority, we're not getting any centrist policies. Even the Right Wing has convinced themselves and their constituents that he is way liberal!!! So now his liberal policies (actually centrist policies) are under fire and are going to get modified to the right. The lesson for me being that if I want centrist policies I have to vote for real far left liberals. Imagine if Obama had strongly insisted upon Universal Healthcare. Might then the compromise be a "Public Option"???
Anyway, sorry to go on a rant, but those on the left side of center really need to understand what they're dealing with. It's really easy to equate Democrat with Liberal, Republican with Conservative, but the bottom line is that there are many, many shades of Blue and Red. Just 'cause a guy calls himself a Democrat doesn't mean he's not purple. If he's telling you he's purple, if all the facts say that he's purple, don't turn around and get all upset because he's not blue enough!!! DUH!
Here's PL:
Well, I agree, L56, that many people erroneously read Obama as a "liberal" during the 2008 campaign, even though his positions were generally not so liberal, and as a result of those expectations, many people are angry and disappointed now. Personally, I didn't vote for Obama because I thought he was a liberal, or even a centrist, for that matter. I voted for him because I felt that he was a focused, grounded, intelligent adult, an item we haven't seen in the White House in decades, and I thought him flexible and practical enough to assess situations on the merits, rather than ideology. Pretty much, I still think this about Obama. I still think he has great leadership qualities.
But as the title of my post, spinning off of Maryanne Williamson's article, implies, I do not feel that any political leader can salvage America's devolution at this point.
What our country needs at this point is an "intervention."
Just as Carl Jung realized, and revealed in his correspondence with Bill Wilson who led the founding of Alcoholics Anonymous, that some problems were untreatable through psychoanalysis alone, and required a "spiritual experience," America right now, it is clear, desperately needs a spiritual awakening (not to be confused with anything religious, by the way, because religion is actually a microcosm of politics at its worst).
When primitive, fear-based beliefs and attitudes become entrenched, stultifying our intellects and emotional intelligence, and our empathy becomes encrusted beneath layers of anger and need and greed, no political leader, political party or even political movement will penetrate deep enough to heal the infection and disorder. None. Not liberal, conservative, centrist or tea bag, because none of these parties demonstrate any of the soul qualities, most especially not sense of oneness, needed to bring us together.
Whether the catalyst for that intervention comes in the form of more natural disasters or man-made disasters, I don't know, and where our collective bottom is remains to be seen. I am continually surprised by how low we seem determined to go as a society. The extremes we've reached in our levels of avarice, egoism and narcissism, combined with the virulent, unchecked diseases of racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia and willful ignorance boggles the mind.
And the enablers are legion.
I wish it were as simple as you describe, LOFF56. I wish it were simply a matter of voting one way or the other. But I fear that we are past that point.
America needs an intervention.
See... yet again... I said this the day after he got elected, and I'll keep saying it again, why we ever thought that Obama was going to be a liberal president is just beyond logic and quite frankly the facts. We deluded ourselves into believing that. If we're upset that he's not meeting our expectations, quite frankly it's because our expectations were way off the mark!!
As I wrote then, and I'm still writing now, every platform that he stood on was a centrist one. No Gay marriage, continuing the bailouts, continuing the wars, etc... Even healthcare reform! Let's be real, a liberal solution to healthcare would be a Universal Healthcare system. Even the House bill which so far is the most left leaning, barely holds onto a "Public Option". Have we completely lost our perspective. "Optional" is SO far from "Universal"!!!
Thinking that Obama was gonna' be like a Kennedy or a Dennis Kucinich is just plain delusional.
The irony for me in all of this is that I like to consider myself a centrist, (leaning to the left for sure though). But having a centrist in the White House with the stubborn obstructionist Right Wing in the minority, we're not getting any centrist policies. Even the Right Wing has convinced themselves and their constituents that he is way liberal!!! So now his liberal policies (actually centrist policies) are under fire and are going to get modified to the right. The lesson for me being that if I want centrist policies I have to vote for real far left liberals. Imagine if Obama had strongly insisted upon Universal Healthcare. Might then the compromise be a "Public Option"???
Anyway, sorry to go on a rant, but those on the left side of center really need to understand what they're dealing with. It's really easy to equate Democrat with Liberal, Republican with Conservative, but the bottom line is that there are many, many shades of Blue and Red. Just 'cause a guy calls himself a Democrat doesn't mean he's not purple. If he's telling you he's purple, if all the facts say that he's purple, don't turn around and get all upset because he's not blue enough!!! DUH!
Here's PL:
Well, I agree, L56, that many people erroneously read Obama as a "liberal" during the 2008 campaign, even though his positions were generally not so liberal, and as a result of those expectations, many people are angry and disappointed now. Personally, I didn't vote for Obama because I thought he was a liberal, or even a centrist, for that matter. I voted for him because I felt that he was a focused, grounded, intelligent adult, an item we haven't seen in the White House in decades, and I thought him flexible and practical enough to assess situations on the merits, rather than ideology. Pretty much, I still think this about Obama. I still think he has great leadership qualities.
But as the title of my post, spinning off of Maryanne Williamson's article, implies, I do not feel that any political leader can salvage America's devolution at this point.
What our country needs at this point is an "intervention."
Just as Carl Jung realized, and revealed in his correspondence with Bill Wilson who led the founding of Alcoholics Anonymous, that some problems were untreatable through psychoanalysis alone, and required a "spiritual experience," America right now, it is clear, desperately needs a spiritual awakening (not to be confused with anything religious, by the way, because religion is actually a microcosm of politics at its worst).
When primitive, fear-based beliefs and attitudes become entrenched, stultifying our intellects and emotional intelligence, and our empathy becomes encrusted beneath layers of anger and need and greed, no political leader, political party or even political movement will penetrate deep enough to heal the infection and disorder. None. Not liberal, conservative, centrist or tea bag, because none of these parties demonstrate any of the soul qualities, most especially not sense of oneness, needed to bring us together.
Whether the catalyst for that intervention comes in the form of more natural disasters or man-made disasters, I don't know, and where our collective bottom is remains to be seen. I am continually surprised by how low we seem determined to go as a society. The extremes we've reached in our levels of avarice, egoism and narcissism, combined with the virulent, unchecked diseases of racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia and willful ignorance boggles the mind.
And the enablers are legion.
I wish it were as simple as you describe, LOFF56. I wish it were simply a matter of voting one way or the other. But I fear that we are past that point.
America needs an intervention.
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