REPOST: RAISING A CHILD? HIRE A CARPENTER!

Here's a piece by Jeffrey Shaffer that was on the Huffington Post entitled:"We're Being Bad: Are Mom And Dad To Blame?"

Here we go again, on the nature versus nurture debate! My position? Well, first of all, it's both - nature and nurture - and yes, there are constitutional and soul factors (and soul-age factors) at work in a child's emerging personality, but of this there is no doubt: parents are the least qualified of all adults to raise children!

You need a license to drive a car, a degree to teach elementary school, time as an apprentice to become a carpenter, but to become a parent, all you have to do is get pregnant, or get someone pregnant, and voila! Instant parent, almost unilaterally in charge of another human being's mental, emotional and physical development and well-being, even if you have absolutely no clue, even if you're a completely off-the-scale borderline personality, even if you're the Octomom! And as if the lack of qualifications wasn't a big enough problem, there's the psychological reality (what Freud referred to as the "child is father to the man" syndrome) that parents inevitably dump transferences, projections and identifications onto their children's shoulders, unless of course, they've done a lot of serious self-work before they have a child and... well, don't get me started on how often that happens.

Oh, and in case any objecting parents want to claim that "love" is a qualification for being a parent, I refer you to famed psychologist, Bruno Bettleheim's landmark book, "LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH."

It's not.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Some other things you need a license for:

(not necessarily in all states or cities)
Fishing
Hunting
Owning a gun
Owning a dog
Breeding dogs
Driving
Driving a Scooter
Getting married
Being an electrician
Being a plumber
Being an architect
Selling liquor
Being a Financial Advisor

Things you need a Permit for:
Protesting
Painting your house
Using a public park
Learning to Drive
Playing music in public
Selling Pretzels
Playing softball
Taking your bike on a Train!! LOL

I'm sure there are hundreds if not thousands more, but these are pretty silly.

That's right, you need a license to breed a dog but not a human!!!

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