The theory presented basically purports that the latter day post-hippie then prosperous Baby Boom generation spawned a generation of entitled narcissists - their kids - who expect everything in their fantasy life to come true, but don't want to work for it. - at all. This is a current and very popular idea, and sociologically, holds some merit. But it is also superficial and a generalization, of course, as all 3D theories must be.
I'm sure the FPL reader who sent me the link did so because she knows that a focus of the work that I do with people includes guidance to rid oneself of not just unrealistic expectations, but of all expectations.
Here's Eckhart Tolle:
"Today I’m going to suggest a small change in mindset that could change your life. I won’t keep you in suspense. Here it is: think of nothing that happens as either good or bad. Stop judging, and stop expecting. It’s a tiny change — all you have to do is say, ‘That wasn’t good or bad, it just happened, it just is.’ It’s tiny, but it takes practice, and amazingly, it can knock you on your ass. Why? Because with this little change, you will no longer be swayed up and down depending on whether good things or bad things happen to you, whether people (and their actions) are good or bad. You will learn to accept things as they are, and move within that landscape mindfully. You will no longer expect good things to happen (or bad things), but will just take things as they come, and be content with whatever comes. This means you’ll no longer be disappointed, or unhappy. The second half of this change is just as small, but just as important: dropping expectations. Not lowering expectations, but eliminating them."
Really? No expectations, Eckhart? Wouldn't that lead to complacency? Lethargy? Boredom? If we didn't have high hopes for things, didn't have goals, a focus on outcomes, what would motivate us to do anything?
I'm glad I asked.
As a screenwriter by avocation (at least so far), I've have heard from many fellow writers, producers, actors, etc., that every good screenplay has conflict in it. In fact, I have been told, that every scene in every good screenplay must have conflict in it. There must always be "tension," the conventional wisdom goes, something for the hero to overcome, face, defeat or defy, in order for a story to be interesting. Many people feel that this is also the key to an interesting, exciting life, as well, and so, they are always creating barriers, crises and limitations to break through in their daily lives. What fun!
Nonetheless, I have wondered, what might be interesting about a story or a life that didn't have conflict as its motivating force? If there weren't obstacles to overcome, if there were no victories to be won by defeating someone or something outside or even inside of ourselves, if there were no resistance, what would make life exciting?
That's right. Creating.
The main thing we do from the highest levels of our being is create... and then, experience what we create... and then, create some more. Endless creation. That is essentially the main activity of All That Is. Seems pretty exciting to me.
So, back to the question of where would motivation come from?
Motivation would come from desire and inspiration. Desire and inspiration come directly from our Higher Selves. They are the initial stirrings of creation in a physical body in a linear time continuum. (In non-physical form, desire, inspiration and creation, as well as experiencing, would occur simultaneously.) And make no mistake, our desires and inspirations are not random or whimsical, but rather, they are messages about what our Higher Self would like to create through us. And folks, yes, our desires are meant to be fulfilled. Really.
The process looks like this: desire and inspiration come from our Higher Self. This stirs the imagination. Our task at that point is to play with images and visions of the fulfillment of the desires through creative expression. Then, through this playing process, we will attract opportunities and find paths for action in the physical world to actualize our desire.
So, where do expectations fit in.. or not fit in?
First of all, you can only have expectations if you are not focused in the moment. Expectations are always about a future outcome that the lower self mind and ego believes is best, and said pictured outcome is often rooted in the idea of undoing or overcoming a less-than-satisfying past. This is a constipated creative process at best.
Secondly, expectations, as a function of the lower self mind and ego, are inherently limited to what the lower self mind and ego can conceive of. And that mean no "miracles," no serendipity, no quantum leaps, just the... expected.
So, folks, whatever generation you're from, let go of your judgments and expectations, tune into your desires, use your imagination and create. No need for conflict or obstacles or antagonists in your story. Unless of course that's what you desire.
Comment Lao Tzu?
“When people see some things as beautiful, other things become ugly.
When people see some things as good, other things become bad.”