Here's a great true story:
A former patient of mine came back to see me for a few sessions a while ago because, seemingly out of nowhere, he'd had a stroke about a month earlier. He'd been to the hospital, undergone many tests, was winding down a regimen of physical therapy and seemed to be doing fine.
So, why did he come to see me? Well, after all the tests, the doctors and technicians couldn't identify a medical cause for the stroke, and this patient had worked on himself long enough to at least believe it was worth investigating possible non-medical causes. After about half the session had gone by, though, we hadn't come up with anything. His marriage seemed better than ever; his kids were doing okay; he was looking for a new job, but was getting great support from his current job, even getting full pay while he was laid up because his employers thought so highly of him. We were both kind of puzzled, but we just kept talking, not wanting to try and force a conclusion.
At one point, he told me that he did have one really unusual experience since the stroke. He'd had a laughing fit while kibitzing around with his ten year old son. A real, gut-clenching, tear-inducing laughing fit - over something silly that he couldn't even remember. His son was astonished. "Dad, you never laugh so hard!" the boy said. "Are you okay?"
Bingo! The light bulb when off in my head.
You see, although this particular man had overcome many challenges in the course of his self-work, and had accomplished much, he had never given up his "cool" mask. As both a person of Irish descent, and an old Sixties hipster, this guy never laughed or cried too whole-heartedly because it wasn't... cool. Indeed, he admitted that when he let go so fully with his son, it made him a bit uncomfortable. But I got it, and after we talked about it, so did he. The unexplained stroke was a little zap from his Higher Self to let him know what he still had left to do in this lifetime before his work was done. He had to remove that cool mask and learn how to laugh and cry fully... which explains why he came to me.
I was moved to tears in the session at that moment of realization and clarity. Our souls are so relentless in the pursuit of our self-actualization that a stroke, heart attack, financial crisis, break-up of a relationship, whatever it takes, will be used to wake us up and create the opportunity for positive change in the areas that matter most. And laughter is one of those areas, one of the most important channels through which our spirits express. As John Travolta's angelic character said in the movie, "Michael": "You gotta laugh - it's the key to loving."
And loving is what this whole experiment on earth is all about.
Congratulations, my friend. Keep on laughing.
Repost: "More on Sexual Healing!"
Someone asked me an interesting question about sex in a session once. The gist of it was, if nature never screws up (and I always say it never does), why would human beings have sexual desire after our optimal childbearing years have passed? The question, of course, comes on the heels of, and is a variation on, a larger question that many people and couples grapple with, which is why does Eros fade?
I've written a lot about the last question - why Eros fades (and why it doesn't have to) - so in this post, I will respond to the initial question - why does sexual desire continue into the middle and elder years, when it no longer seems "practical" for survival purposes?
In a word: Pleasure. Pleasure actually is is important to human beings, and not just because it is, well... pleasurable, but also because it is essential and crucial to our well-being. And the sexual experience, especially sexual union between two people who are in love, is the highest form of pleasure human beings can experience. Furthermore, the more advanced a person is in their self-work, the more important pleasure is. (Believe it or not, Mr. Spock, the logical Vulcan of Star Trek - channeled by Gene Roddenberry - once pointed out: "The more advanced the species, the more the need for play.")
Here's an excerpt from another must read Pathwork Guide Lecture on pleasure as the essence of life:
"When the deepest layers of the psyche are reached, it becomes apparent that the raw, primitive instincts are concerned only with the experience of pleasure. Humanity often claims that pleasure for its own sake is wrong. The truth is exactly the opposite."
Right. Nor is pleasure-seeking or healthy hedonism "selfish."
The Guide again:
"When the personality is harmoniously developed, the pleasure drive includes others, it gives and receives, and this is as it should be. In a mature individual it is not self-centered and excluding. Hence it cannot be antisocial."
Pleasure. Pleasure, and specifically sexual pleasure, opens the human being and human body up to the higher levels of our spiritual nature, levels that animals and little children are naturally open to. Children, therefore, and animals, except to procreate, don't need sex in the same way as an adult human being does. "Sexual healing," (Thank you, Marvin!) in other words, is real. We need sex to sustain and expand our spiritual connection, to remain healthy, to keep the chi flowing. Will we someday evolve as a species to a place where we will be so open and spiritually connected that we don't need sex? Probably... but why not enjoy ourselves fully in the meantime?
I've written a lot about the last question - why Eros fades (and why it doesn't have to) - so in this post, I will respond to the initial question - why does sexual desire continue into the middle and elder years, when it no longer seems "practical" for survival purposes?
In a word: Pleasure. Pleasure actually is is important to human beings, and not just because it is, well... pleasurable, but also because it is essential and crucial to our well-being. And the sexual experience, especially sexual union between two people who are in love, is the highest form of pleasure human beings can experience. Furthermore, the more advanced a person is in their self-work, the more important pleasure is. (Believe it or not, Mr. Spock, the logical Vulcan of Star Trek - channeled by Gene Roddenberry - once pointed out: "The more advanced the species, the more the need for play.")
Here's an excerpt from another must read Pathwork Guide Lecture on pleasure as the essence of life:
"When the deepest layers of the psyche are reached, it becomes apparent that the raw, primitive instincts are concerned only with the experience of pleasure. Humanity often claims that pleasure for its own sake is wrong. The truth is exactly the opposite."
Right. Nor is pleasure-seeking or healthy hedonism "selfish."
The Guide again:
"When the personality is harmoniously developed, the pleasure drive includes others, it gives and receives, and this is as it should be. In a mature individual it is not self-centered and excluding. Hence it cannot be antisocial."
Pleasure. Pleasure, and specifically sexual pleasure, opens the human being and human body up to the higher levels of our spiritual nature, levels that animals and little children are naturally open to. Children, therefore, and animals, except to procreate, don't need sex in the same way as an adult human being does. "Sexual healing," (Thank you, Marvin!) in other words, is real. We need sex to sustain and expand our spiritual connection, to remain healthy, to keep the chi flowing. Will we someday evolve as a species to a place where we will be so open and spiritually connected that we don't need sex? Probably... but why not enjoy ourselves fully in the meantime?
"ANONYMOUS" FINDS DISPARITY IN PL'S "CURLY VS. KING" POST!/PL RESPONDS!
Here's Anonymous:
"Just ran across your blog through the 'Next Blog' button on top of the Blogger format. I love the disparity between this post and the blog's description: 'On this blog, we will explore ways in which we can reconnect to our true selves and live lives of physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and material fulfillment, while remaining in a state of harmony with others and with the world around us."
Here's PL:
I'm assuming that by "disparity," Anon, you're thinking that being in a "state of harmony with others" means you don't call them "rodeo clowns" and "psychopathic bimbos?" But the very next line in the FPL description you quote starts out with these 5 words: "We will discover the truth..."
You see, being in a state of harmony doesn't mean being "nice" anymore than it means being "nasty." It means being in truth.
I do indeed believe that Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin are aspects of All That Is and therefore, aspects of me. Those aspects are presently acting out from a very low vibration in the current drama being played out in 3-dimensional reality, and so by exposing them, by making fun of them at times, and mainly by challenging the low level of consciousness they represent, I am connecting to myself, loving myself and working towards raising my own vibration.
Hope that clears it up. You betcha!
"Just ran across your blog through the 'Next Blog' button on top of the Blogger format. I love the disparity between this post and the blog's description: 'On this blog, we will explore ways in which we can reconnect to our true selves and live lives of physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and material fulfillment, while remaining in a state of harmony with others and with the world around us."
Here's PL:
I'm assuming that by "disparity," Anon, you're thinking that being in a "state of harmony with others" means you don't call them "rodeo clowns" and "psychopathic bimbos?" But the very next line in the FPL description you quote starts out with these 5 words: "We will discover the truth..."
You see, being in a state of harmony doesn't mean being "nice" anymore than it means being "nasty." It means being in truth.
I do indeed believe that Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin are aspects of All That Is and therefore, aspects of me. Those aspects are presently acting out from a very low vibration in the current drama being played out in 3-dimensional reality, and so by exposing them, by making fun of them at times, and mainly by challenging the low level of consciousness they represent, I am connecting to myself, loving myself and working towards raising my own vibration.
Hope that clears it up. You betcha!
TIME OUT FOR A LITTLE LOW-BROW 3D! CURLY VS. KING?! WILMA VS. ROSA?!
That's what we're looking at this weekend on the anniversary of Martin Luther King's "I Have a Dream" speech.
In terms of courage, intelligence, sanity and importance to 3D history (which is the only kind of history you can have), we've got, on the one hand, the freak show of a rodeo clown and a psychopathic bimbo leading a group of sexless, putrified, bigoted Neanderthals in front of the same monuments where, on the other hand, truly historical figures once were honored by a country desiring to heal itself. (Imagine a national holiday celebrating Glenn Beck's life?! Or Sarah Palin's?!!? That would be hysterical, not historical!)
Rest assured, folks. Beck and Palin, and the Frontal Lobers who drool at their feet, pose no real threat to what's left of the idea of the United States of America. They are old news, a dying breed, temporarily stinking up the joint, but ultimately disintegrating like old cow dung in the beautiful August sun. Listen to King's speech today and take a shower, and Curly and Wilma will go back to being merely the low-brow comedian and cartoon character they actually are.
Meanwhile, I will do my ho'opopono meditation to the Universe for creating Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin: I am sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you!
In terms of courage, intelligence, sanity and importance to 3D history (which is the only kind of history you can have), we've got, on the one hand, the freak show of a rodeo clown and a psychopathic bimbo leading a group of sexless, putrified, bigoted Neanderthals in front of the same monuments where, on the other hand, truly historical figures once were honored by a country desiring to heal itself. (Imagine a national holiday celebrating Glenn Beck's life?! Or Sarah Palin's?!!? That would be hysterical, not historical!)
Rest assured, folks. Beck and Palin, and the Frontal Lobers who drool at their feet, pose no real threat to what's left of the idea of the United States of America. They are old news, a dying breed, temporarily stinking up the joint, but ultimately disintegrating like old cow dung in the beautiful August sun. Listen to King's speech today and take a shower, and Curly and Wilma will go back to being merely the low-brow comedian and cartoon character they actually are.
Meanwhile, I will do my ho'opopono meditation to the Universe for creating Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin: I am sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you!
Repost of a Recent Headline: "Do You Only Live Once? Experiments Suggest Life Not One-Time Deal!"
Science is catching up, folks! Here's a passage from a very interesting article:
"We think we die and rot into the ground, and thus must squeeze everything in before it's too late. If life -- yours, mine -- is a just a one-time deal, then we're as likely to be screwed as pampered. But experiments suggest this view of the world may be wrong. The results of quantum physics confirm that observations can't be predicted absolutely. Instead, there's a range of possible observations each with a different probability. One mainstream explanation, the 'many-worlds' interpretation, states that there are an infinite number of universes (the 'multiverse'). Everything that can possibly happen occurs in some universe. The old mechanical -- "we're just a bunch of atoms" −- view of life loses its grip in these scenarios."
Read the rest of the article HERE.
"We think we die and rot into the ground, and thus must squeeze everything in before it's too late. If life -- yours, mine -- is a just a one-time deal, then we're as likely to be screwed as pampered. But experiments suggest this view of the world may be wrong. The results of quantum physics confirm that observations can't be predicted absolutely. Instead, there's a range of possible observations each with a different probability. One mainstream explanation, the 'many-worlds' interpretation, states that there are an infinite number of universes (the 'multiverse'). Everything that can possibly happen occurs in some universe. The old mechanical -- "we're just a bunch of atoms" −- view of life loses its grip in these scenarios."
Read the rest of the article HERE.
READER APPRECIATES FPL!/ORAL CS REPOSTED
A READER WRITES:
"Thank you for a truly wonderful blog and progressive opinions. Just started reading it and practising the therapeutic tasks and approach for the first three character structures to help me heal and grow - such useful info! Can't find the therap. tasks and therap. approach for the oral character structure, though - would you kindly repost it? Thank you so much again, will keep reading...
Warm regards, Ksenija, EU"
PL:
Below are the missing sections, Ksenija. The rest of the Oral Character Structure material is HERE. Thanks for reading and for the lovely comment.
THERAPEUTIC TASKS (Oral Character Structure)
- Acknowledge, accept and express emotional needs and longings;
- Develop the capacity to reach out, while releasing clinging or grabbing impulse;
- Face the reality of the early deprivation in childhood and finish grieving for losses;
- Face and move through the fears of rejection and abandonment;
- Develop the capacity to experience the self as autonomous without needing to be alone in the world;
- Develop the capacity to connect to others without feeling the loss of identity and autonomy;
- Relinquish addictions to transitional objects and self-numbing substances by experiencing direct pleasure and self-nurturance;
- Create a foundation of support in the physical world by stabilizing and sustaining relationships, work-life and income, and basic self-care functions;
- Energize and strengthen the feet and legs as a foundation of support;
- Recharge the chest and open the capacity to receive life and give and receive love;
- Energize aggression and release rage held in the oral segment and the hands;
- Acknowledge and experience the different aspects of the personality, opening the lines of communication between them, while establishing an identification with the adult self;
- Become aware of the erroneous conclusions, images and beliefs of the mask/false self, and the limitations and unreality of the idealized self image;
- Experience pleasure and expansion, and recognize and express one’s Higher Self aspects with less fear of losing one’s self;
- Primary raw negative expression that needs release: “Give it to me!”
- Primary positive self-affirmation that needs assertion: “I have the right to need.”
THERAPEUTIC APPROACH (Oral Character Structure)
- Establish a supportive, nurturing environment, acknowledging the frustration, despair and hopelessness the person has felt in trying to get their needs met; listen patiently and empathetically to the person’s expression of his or her considerable pain (including physical) and feelings of loss;
- While acknowledging the person’s genuine desire to give to others, begin confronting the hidden agenda to get from others through a mask of giving;
- Demystify the underlying causes of addictive behaviors and repetitive cycles and challenge the helpless, out-of-control image the person has of the inner self and of his or her needs and longings;
- Engage the person’s innate belief in the abundance of life that has been denied but is demonstrated by the very fact of their frustration;
- Guide the person into fuller breathing by opening up the chest, and also facilitate the experience of self-support by grounding the legs and feet; energize the hands and mouth by facilitating the expressing of rage through hitting, towel-twisting (choking the suffocating mother), biting, yelling, and by reaching for help with the hands and arms; extensive rage held in the jaw can be released through massage and then kicking; facilitate deeper crying by opening up the lower abdomen through rolling and massage of the diaphragmatic segment and lower back; consistent encouragement, creativity and patience will be needed to help the person engage the body in the therapy when the impulse to collapse surfaces; the person with this structure will not want to “do the work”, but rather will try to get the therapist to “do it for them”; massaging the body, holding and cuddling, allowing the person to receive support and comfort directly without having to reciprocate can be a very corrective experience;
- Help the person face the impossible dilemma of the symbiotic bind they were in - needing to merge with a parent who didn’t give enough, and then needing to separate when they felt too weak to do so or weren’t let go of by a clinging parent; reassure the person that they can now experience that bond with the therapist, and ultimately their own adult self, without risk of abandonment or suffocation;
- While allowing the dependency feelings of the person to be experienced positively with the therapist, challenge any idealizations of the therapist, and explore, without confrontation, passive behaviors that express the resentment that comes from those idealizations and hidden demands to be taken care of (i.e.- not paying fees);
- The person who employs this character structure is an inherently giving person who needs to open up to receiving again in the child aspect of the personality that has been deprived; if the therapist gives directly and genuinely to this person, without “rescuing”, and “lends” his or her ego temporarily to the person, he or she will flourish as the deep capacities for love and gratitude become directed towards self-nurturance and self-love by the adult;
- Help the person recognize their Higher Self aspects, especially their truly giving nature, to see that their gifts are there even when hidden behind the mask, and that although they have a wounded aspect in their personality, they need not identify with that aspect in order for it to get the help it needs;
- In the later stages of therapy, as the person drops the mask and releases the raw negative feelings, fear of pleasure and expansion must be addressed as it comes up with reassurance, based on experience, that they can tolerate the energy now and that the fear is not a regression or a setback.
"Thank you for a truly wonderful blog and progressive opinions. Just started reading it and practising the therapeutic tasks and approach for the first three character structures to help me heal and grow - such useful info! Can't find the therap. tasks and therap. approach for the oral character structure, though - would you kindly repost it? Thank you so much again, will keep reading...
Warm regards, Ksenija, EU"
PL:
Below are the missing sections, Ksenija. The rest of the Oral Character Structure material is HERE. Thanks for reading and for the lovely comment.
THERAPEUTIC TASKS (Oral Character Structure)
- Acknowledge, accept and express emotional needs and longings;
- Develop the capacity to reach out, while releasing clinging or grabbing impulse;
- Face the reality of the early deprivation in childhood and finish grieving for losses;
- Face and move through the fears of rejection and abandonment;
- Develop the capacity to experience the self as autonomous without needing to be alone in the world;
- Develop the capacity to connect to others without feeling the loss of identity and autonomy;
- Relinquish addictions to transitional objects and self-numbing substances by experiencing direct pleasure and self-nurturance;
- Create a foundation of support in the physical world by stabilizing and sustaining relationships, work-life and income, and basic self-care functions;
- Energize and strengthen the feet and legs as a foundation of support;
- Recharge the chest and open the capacity to receive life and give and receive love;
- Energize aggression and release rage held in the oral segment and the hands;
- Acknowledge and experience the different aspects of the personality, opening the lines of communication between them, while establishing an identification with the adult self;
- Become aware of the erroneous conclusions, images and beliefs of the mask/false self, and the limitations and unreality of the idealized self image;
- Experience pleasure and expansion, and recognize and express one’s Higher Self aspects with less fear of losing one’s self;
- Primary raw negative expression that needs release: “Give it to me!”
- Primary positive self-affirmation that needs assertion: “I have the right to need.”
THERAPEUTIC APPROACH (Oral Character Structure)
- Establish a supportive, nurturing environment, acknowledging the frustration, despair and hopelessness the person has felt in trying to get their needs met; listen patiently and empathetically to the person’s expression of his or her considerable pain (including physical) and feelings of loss;
- While acknowledging the person’s genuine desire to give to others, begin confronting the hidden agenda to get from others through a mask of giving;
- Demystify the underlying causes of addictive behaviors and repetitive cycles and challenge the helpless, out-of-control image the person has of the inner self and of his or her needs and longings;
- Engage the person’s innate belief in the abundance of life that has been denied but is demonstrated by the very fact of their frustration;
- Guide the person into fuller breathing by opening up the chest, and also facilitate the experience of self-support by grounding the legs and feet; energize the hands and mouth by facilitating the expressing of rage through hitting, towel-twisting (choking the suffocating mother), biting, yelling, and by reaching for help with the hands and arms; extensive rage held in the jaw can be released through massage and then kicking; facilitate deeper crying by opening up the lower abdomen through rolling and massage of the diaphragmatic segment and lower back; consistent encouragement, creativity and patience will be needed to help the person engage the body in the therapy when the impulse to collapse surfaces; the person with this structure will not want to “do the work”, but rather will try to get the therapist to “do it for them”; massaging the body, holding and cuddling, allowing the person to receive support and comfort directly without having to reciprocate can be a very corrective experience;
- Help the person face the impossible dilemma of the symbiotic bind they were in - needing to merge with a parent who didn’t give enough, and then needing to separate when they felt too weak to do so or weren’t let go of by a clinging parent; reassure the person that they can now experience that bond with the therapist, and ultimately their own adult self, without risk of abandonment or suffocation;
- While allowing the dependency feelings of the person to be experienced positively with the therapist, challenge any idealizations of the therapist, and explore, without confrontation, passive behaviors that express the resentment that comes from those idealizations and hidden demands to be taken care of (i.e.- not paying fees);
- The person who employs this character structure is an inherently giving person who needs to open up to receiving again in the child aspect of the personality that has been deprived; if the therapist gives directly and genuinely to this person, without “rescuing”, and “lends” his or her ego temporarily to the person, he or she will flourish as the deep capacities for love and gratitude become directed towards self-nurturance and self-love by the adult;
- Help the person recognize their Higher Self aspects, especially their truly giving nature, to see that their gifts are there even when hidden behind the mask, and that although they have a wounded aspect in their personality, they need not identify with that aspect in order for it to get the help it needs;
- In the later stages of therapy, as the person drops the mask and releases the raw negative feelings, fear of pleasure and expansion must be addressed as it comes up with reassurance, based on experience, that they can tolerate the energy now and that the fear is not a regression or a setback.
TODAY'S DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSION NEWS STORY!
You can't say that the Universe doesn't maintain an appreciation for irony in its messages to humanity.
Responsible for the slaughter of millions of Jews and a hero to self-avowed racists, recent DNA tests apparently show that Adolf Hitler may have had Jewish and African ancestry!
Responsible for the slaughter of millions of Jews and a hero to self-avowed racists, recent DNA tests apparently show that Adolf Hitler may have had Jewish and African ancestry!
TODAY'S DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSION NEWS STORY!
A new book attempts to set the record straight on the subject of UFOs. "UFOs: Generals, Pilots and Government Officials Go On the Record" (Harmony Books / The Crown Publishing Group) by journalist Leslie Kean, pulls back the curtain on the incredible occurrences of unexplained behavior by unknown objects over many decades.
"UFOs" includes a foreword by John Podesta and riveting, first-person accounts written by over a dozen military and aviation witnesses and official investigators from around the world. Contributors include a former governor of Arizona, the former head of the FAA's Accidents and Investigations Division, military generals from five countries, a retired senior research scientist from NASA, Air Force and commercial pilots, and government officials from agencies investigating UFOs in their respective countries.
For more information, click HERE.
"UFOs" includes a foreword by John Podesta and riveting, first-person accounts written by over a dozen military and aviation witnesses and official investigators from around the world. Contributors include a former governor of Arizona, the former head of the FAA's Accidents and Investigations Division, military generals from five countries, a retired senior research scientist from NASA, Air Force and commercial pilots, and government officials from agencies investigating UFOs in their respective countries.
For more information, click HERE.
AS BAD AS IT GETS - MORE ON CRAZILY ENMESHED "VELCRO" PARENTS!
THIS is from yesterday's NY Times: "As the latest wave of superinvolved parents delivers its children to college, institutions are building into the day, normally one of high emotion, activities meant to punctuate and speed the separation. It is part of an increasingly complex process, in the age of Skype and twice-daily texts home, in which colleges are urging “Velcro parents” to back off so students can develop independence."
FOREVER YOUNG?!
The cover story of today's NY Times Magazine asks: "Why are so many people in their 20s taking so long to grow up?"
Hello?! What did you expect?
I've been writing about this trend for years, now, especially since I've been living in Park Slope, the capital of narcissistic parents raising emotionally stunted children. Apparently, though, this Brooklyn enclave has merely been the standard bearer for a national movement. While there are more devouring, suffocating, coddling mothers and castrated or otherwise neutered fathers breeding faux princes and princesses per square mile out here in Stepford than anywhere else I've ever lived or know of, the entire country seems to have gotten on board the dysfunction train.
The Times piece focuses on how many 20-somethings either still live or come back to live with their parents because they have no capacity for independent living or thinking. And make no mistake, this grossly delayed individuation isn't an economic problem anymore than the euphemistically labelled "attention deficit disorder" trend is a brain problem.
This is a parenting problem!
But hey, that's the psychological/sociological assessment of the situation, or as I've been taking to calling it lately, the "3-dimensional" perspective.
Metaphysically speaking, though, this trend toward apparent maturational retardation is merely... interesting. Meaning, it makes me curious to understand from the expanded Fourth Dimensional perspective what purpose this is inevitably serving in our evolution.
Perhaps it is accelerating the collapse of our institutionalized way of organizing society, for example, as an entire generation of young adults arrive to be unable or unwilling to work at what we once called a "job," (I have written about "The End of the Job" as an archaic way of creating prosperity before HERE.) or are uninterested in attending, let alone graduating from traditional universities where "knowledge" is transferred to kids without wisdom. Also good news is that fewer and fewer young people are marrying or having kids, at least not in their 20's. This is crucial to our evolution because in an enlightened society, young adults would not be expected to raise children.
So, while the short view looks alarming, the expanded view offers hope. Yes, even though, as a psychotherapist and advocate for children for 3 decades in 3D, I've railed against the ineptitude of parents and the insidiousness of institutions charged with tending to our offspring's mental and physical well-being, I do see something positive in this present day process of deconstruction. Very often, it has to become clear that a way of living has been outgrown, so we can make the move to a new way.
It's all good, folks.
Hello?! What did you expect?
I've been writing about this trend for years, now, especially since I've been living in Park Slope, the capital of narcissistic parents raising emotionally stunted children. Apparently, though, this Brooklyn enclave has merely been the standard bearer for a national movement. While there are more devouring, suffocating, coddling mothers and castrated or otherwise neutered fathers breeding faux princes and princesses per square mile out here in Stepford than anywhere else I've ever lived or know of, the entire country seems to have gotten on board the dysfunction train.
The Times piece focuses on how many 20-somethings either still live or come back to live with their parents because they have no capacity for independent living or thinking. And make no mistake, this grossly delayed individuation isn't an economic problem anymore than the euphemistically labelled "attention deficit disorder" trend is a brain problem.
This is a parenting problem!
But hey, that's the psychological/sociological assessment of the situation, or as I've been taking to calling it lately, the "3-dimensional" perspective.
Metaphysically speaking, though, this trend toward apparent maturational retardation is merely... interesting. Meaning, it makes me curious to understand from the expanded Fourth Dimensional perspective what purpose this is inevitably serving in our evolution.
Perhaps it is accelerating the collapse of our institutionalized way of organizing society, for example, as an entire generation of young adults arrive to be unable or unwilling to work at what we once called a "job," (I have written about "The End of the Job" as an archaic way of creating prosperity before HERE.) or are uninterested in attending, let alone graduating from traditional universities where "knowledge" is transferred to kids without wisdom. Also good news is that fewer and fewer young people are marrying or having kids, at least not in their 20's. This is crucial to our evolution because in an enlightened society, young adults would not be expected to raise children.
So, while the short view looks alarming, the expanded view offers hope. Yes, even though, as a psychotherapist and advocate for children for 3 decades in 3D, I've railed against the ineptitude of parents and the insidiousness of institutions charged with tending to our offspring's mental and physical well-being, I do see something positive in this present day process of deconstruction. Very often, it has to become clear that a way of living has been outgrown, so we can make the move to a new way.
It's all good, folks.
TODAY'S DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSION QUESTION!
What does this say?
I wear eye glasses full-time, now. Without them, most things near or far are somewhat blurry visually. Yet, twice recently, I went to the park with a friend and played softball - which includes catching and hitting a sphere being thrown at me, and hitting a target when I'm doing the throwing - without wearing my glasses.
That's right. I took them off without really thinking about it, perhaps because I never wore glasses back in the day when I regularly played softball.
I didn't think about it.
And by the way, I didn't make one error in the field in today's foray. Yep. Somehow, I "saw" the ball, even though I shouldn't have been able to.
Thoughts?
I wear eye glasses full-time, now. Without them, most things near or far are somewhat blurry visually. Yet, twice recently, I went to the park with a friend and played softball - which includes catching and hitting a sphere being thrown at me, and hitting a target when I'm doing the throwing - without wearing my glasses.
That's right. I took them off without really thinking about it, perhaps because I never wore glasses back in the day when I regularly played softball.
I didn't think about it.
And by the way, I didn't make one error in the field in today's foray. Yep. Somehow, I "saw" the ball, even though I shouldn't have been able to.
Thoughts?
MORE ON CHEF RONNIE!
So, here's the foie gras with fresh figs... 
And here's the ricotta-stuffed French toast brunch...
And here's the ricotta-stuffed French toast brunch...
SEXUAL REPRESSION AND THE 4TH DIMENSION! I'M OUTTA HERE!!
Here's a headline from today's news: Taliban Stone Couple For Adultery In Afghanistan
Is it not simple enough to understand that a society in which such things are possible is so primitive and rooted in the lower levels of 3-dimensional reality that they cannot be elevated in a single lifetime? Only through the arduous and slow process of death and rebirth over many lifetimes can a consciousness operating at that level evolve.
Furthermore, is not equally simple to see that a society engaged in war with such a primitive culture cannot be very much more evolved than those doing the stoning? Ideological leaders in Afghanistan think stoning people to death for having consensual sex makes sense, and political leaders here think that being at war with that country for 9 years makes sense.
Cut to:
REALITY
Raising your vibration through self-awareness, understanding and knowing by connecting to your inner thoughts and feelings will consciously connect you to your spiritual nature and to All That Is, and so will carry you to 4th Dimensional reality, especially right now, because the Wave is upon us.
That's it, folks. There's no "reforming" the current system, except in miniscule increments, and that requires that you stay in the system. The world without deadly sexual repression and war already exists. It's already there, "waiting" for you to enter it. That world in the news isn't going anywhere anytime soon, though, so I don't know about you, but... I'm outta here!
Is it not simple enough to understand that a society in which such things are possible is so primitive and rooted in the lower levels of 3-dimensional reality that they cannot be elevated in a single lifetime? Only through the arduous and slow process of death and rebirth over many lifetimes can a consciousness operating at that level evolve.
Furthermore, is not equally simple to see that a society engaged in war with such a primitive culture cannot be very much more evolved than those doing the stoning? Ideological leaders in Afghanistan think stoning people to death for having consensual sex makes sense, and political leaders here think that being at war with that country for 9 years makes sense.
Cut to:
REALITY
Raising your vibration through self-awareness, understanding and knowing by connecting to your inner thoughts and feelings will consciously connect you to your spiritual nature and to All That Is, and so will carry you to 4th Dimensional reality, especially right now, because the Wave is upon us.
That's it, folks. There's no "reforming" the current system, except in miniscule increments, and that requires that you stay in the system. The world without deadly sexual repression and war already exists. It's already there, "waiting" for you to enter it. That world in the news isn't going anywhere anytime soon, though, so I don't know about you, but... I'm outta here!
Eat, Drink and Be Merry/Live Long and Prosper
I am back from an extraordinary and glorious weekend, unique in my experience, and I would like to tell you about it.
Of course, those who know me will presume that I was at the ocean soaking up the sun and salt water, and they would be correct. The seashore is my favorite place to be, far ahead of the woods, the mountains or the desert. Yes, being at the ocean was the glorious part of the weekend, but what made the two days extraordinary was that we shared the time with another houseguest who was a four star chef!
I mean, I was humbled, folks. I used to think - up until three days ago - that I knew how to cook. But watching "Ronnie," a true artist at his craft, in the kitchen was an eye-opener. And feasting on his creations was a true mind-body-spirit experience. From the foix gras with fresh figs before the melt-in-your-mouth filet mignon on the first night to the 21-bean dip (actually made with 21 different beans!) and fresh fruit-filled sangria before the Brazilian-style grilled chicken the second night, it was a revelation to the taste-buds of everyone present.
And so clearly, the key ingredient in all of Ronnie's dishes was love. Cooking is clearly the man's passion, his art, a soul-gift, for sure, and he is always happy and hands on - literally - when doing it. As an expert masseuse or hands-on-healer will use his or her hands to "read" and release the body, Ronnie used his loving hands to turn things and tell him when things were perfectly done, and release the bouquet of flavors hidden even in simple roasted fingerling potatoes and white asparagus!
Always wanting to contribute something to a weekend of sharing, I usually do a good deal of the cooking when away with friends. I do find it a pleasure and a meditative experience, but I can say without a doubt, now, that it is not my "Zone of Genius," as Gay Hendricks describes in his book, The Big Leap. So, as a fun game, which Ronnie was good-spiritedly open to, I proposed as my contribution to the weekend feasts to buy the ingredients for our two breakfasts with the proviso that Ronnie wouldn't know what I was buying. I would simply buy whatever looked good at the Seaview Market that morning, with no thought as to how the ingredients could come together, and Ronnie's challenge would be to create exquisite dishes out of the groceries.
Needles to say, he was up for it! In the blink of an eye, we were all devouring ricotta-stuffed ciabatta French toast with blueberries and warm maple syrup, a mere day after the mushroom, ham, onion and swiss cheese frittata, so light and fluffy, it practically floated away! I started thinking, I have to talk to the producers who optioned City Rock about this as a possible TV reality show. "STUMP CHEF RONNIE!"
Anyway, folks, I just thought I would share this experience of love and creativity.
Below is a repost of an article I wrote a while ago called "Full Permission Eating."
Salut!
According to two recent studies, red wine will help you live longer and sugar won't kill you even if you're diabetic. Woah! For real?
From one of the articles:
"Two large studies involving more than 21,000 people found that people with Type 2 diabetes had no reduction in their risk of heart attacks and strokes and no reduction in their death rate if they rigorously controlled their blood sugar levels."
And from the other:
"Red wine may be much more potent than was thought in extending human lifespan."
What gives? Well, the bottom line, if you want to skip ahead, is this: what promotes good health and longevity, first and foremost, are happiness and pleasure.
A psychology professor at the University of Pennsylvania, Dr. Paul Rozin, who specializes in, yes, the psychology of food, conducted a survey in America, France, Belgium and Japan in an effort to explain what is referred to as the "French Paradox." The paradox is basically this: the French consume a diet that is very rich and high in fat, yet they have a low rate of obesity and enjoy generally good health, compared to Americans.
Americans, on the other hand, are obsessed with counting calories and cholesterol levels and worry excessively about the effects of food on their bodies, and still, they have a very high rate of obesity comparatively and suffer with more health problems. Dr. Rozin’s survey suggests that the determining factor may be the different cultural attitudes towards food and pleasure.
Rozin is quoted in the journal "Appetite" as saying, "There is a sense among Americans that food is as much a poison as it is a nutrient, and that eating is almost as dangerous as not eating." He goes on to say that "…when a major aspect of life becomes a stress and source of substantial worry, as opposed to pleasure, effects might be seen in both cardiovascular and immune systems." Rozin’s researcher found that the French, on the other hand, of whom only 4 percent follow diets in line with the American recommended guidelines for fat intake, associate eating more with pleasure than with health.
In a related story, the New York Times ran an article in its "Eating Well" column, by Marian Burros, that quoted two professors on nutrition and obesity extolling the virtues and health benefits of enjoying such luscious holiday foods as foie gras, caviar and pumpkin pie, believe it or not! Listen to this:
"Tucked in between the cholesterol and the saturated fat, the calories and the salt in the foie gras, the sausage stuffing and the standing rib roast, there are dozens of nutrients that are highly recommended by the food police. These are the vitamins and minerals and phytochemicals that may prevent cancer and heart disease and a host of other diseases. Everyone already knows that chocolate is a health food: Two pounds of it, particularly dark chocolate, has the same cancer-fighting antioxidants as a quart of tea. But did you know that each time you eat a three-ounce piece of pumpkin pie you may well be reducing your risk of cataracts and macular degeneration? The pumpkin in that small wedge of pie is filled with carotenoids, almost 3,000 micrograms of beta carotene, 1,900 of alpha carotene and 400 of lutein, the carotenoid connected with cataract prevention."
Where is this leading us? Well, the Times also printed an article on Dr. Rozin’s study entitled, "If It Feels Good, Eat It." People will be up in arms perhaps at the suggestion that eating what we want, what we really enjoy, is a reasonable guideline for a diet, yet that is precisely the message of these studies, and it is in keeping with the conceptual foundation of Full Permission Living which is that human beings, if allowed to follow their undistorted desires, will naturally do what’s best for themselves and others without resorting to excess and without having to sacrifice pleasure. Furthermore, if one engages in any activity, including eating, with a spirit of enjoyment and gratitude, it is the premise of FPL that what you take in will benefit you. That may be the original reason for saying a blessing before a meal - to get your mind and digestive system into a positive and receptive mode to aid absorption and facilitate nourishment.
I’ve often thought about the movie, "Michael", in this regard. John Travolta plays the archangel by the same name, and in the film the high-order angelic character is seen consuming huge amounts of sugar, drinking beer, smoking cigarettes and of course, dancing and cavorting with women. I asked myself when I first saw the movie, could such a spiritual being actually indulge himself in that manner and not suffer any negative consequences? Absolutely, I realized. Such a being would be so connected to his spiritual self, so full of joy and gratitude that whatever molecules he took into his body would immediately be transmuted into good nourishment. After all, everything is made of the same basic particles of energy, whether it’s steamed organic broccoli or a hamburger! So what determines the effect of various foods on the body? It must be the individual’s state of consciousness, one’s inner beliefs and attitudes. Indeed, my own grandfather, "Pete", lived without major illness until he died of old age at 91, and he regularly consumed sugar and salt, smoked cigarettes and drank alcohol until the end. How did he do it? Well, for one thing, he rarely indulged in anything to excess, but also, no matter what doctors, the media or younger worried family members said to him, he genuinely never believed these things would harm him. So, perhaps that is why they didn’t. He also rejected stressful behavior as a requirement for being successful, even though he had his own business to run which he did for almost four decades. I never saw Grandpa Pete anxiously rushing around or fretting about anything.
Now, let me issue a qualifier here - none of us is Michael the Archangel and most of us are not, in our hyper-vigilant, type-A culture, Grandpa Pete! Most of us are harboring hidden self-destructive or fearful beliefs and attitudes, and so will unconsciously use food and anything else to create suffering for ourselves if we're not conscious. So the "undistorted desires" part is crucial to living with full permission. Furthermore, if you believe that certain things are harmful to your health, you can’t trick yourself by superimposing another belief over that one and expect not to have disastrous results. How you feel about yourself and your body is a key element that must be brought into conscious awareness in order to be a "healthy hedonist," and the channels to your natural pleasure instinct must be cleared of blockages as well. In other words, a full-spectrum healing process may be needed before you can start indulging in the daily red wine and sweet treats.
Here are some great words of wisdom from Jane Roberts’ "Seth" book, "The Way Toward Health":
"The ideas you have, then, play a large role in the way the body handles its nutrients, and utilizes health and vitality…it is possible for your ideas to cause chemical reactions that impede your body’s ability to accept nourishment. If you believe that the body is evil, the purest health food diet may do you little good at all, while if you have a healthy desire and respect for your physical body, a diet of TV dinners and even fast foods may well keep you healthy and nourished. If we are talking about health, it is to your beliefs that we must look. It is up to you to form a body of beliefs that is worthy of your physical image – for you are nourished by your beliefs, and those beliefs can cause your daily bread to add to your vitality, or add to your cares and stress."
P.S. - A friend and FPL reader recently asked me why I don't include physical movement among the joys and pleasures of life, alongside sex and eating, which I so often speak about. I'm working on it. Stay tuned...
Of course, those who know me will presume that I was at the ocean soaking up the sun and salt water, and they would be correct. The seashore is my favorite place to be, far ahead of the woods, the mountains or the desert. Yes, being at the ocean was the glorious part of the weekend, but what made the two days extraordinary was that we shared the time with another houseguest who was a four star chef!
I mean, I was humbled, folks. I used to think - up until three days ago - that I knew how to cook. But watching "Ronnie," a true artist at his craft, in the kitchen was an eye-opener. And feasting on his creations was a true mind-body-spirit experience. From the foix gras with fresh figs before the melt-in-your-mouth filet mignon on the first night to the 21-bean dip (actually made with 21 different beans!) and fresh fruit-filled sangria before the Brazilian-style grilled chicken the second night, it was a revelation to the taste-buds of everyone present.
And so clearly, the key ingredient in all of Ronnie's dishes was love. Cooking is clearly the man's passion, his art, a soul-gift, for sure, and he is always happy and hands on - literally - when doing it. As an expert masseuse or hands-on-healer will use his or her hands to "read" and release the body, Ronnie used his loving hands to turn things and tell him when things were perfectly done, and release the bouquet of flavors hidden even in simple roasted fingerling potatoes and white asparagus!
Always wanting to contribute something to a weekend of sharing, I usually do a good deal of the cooking when away with friends. I do find it a pleasure and a meditative experience, but I can say without a doubt, now, that it is not my "Zone of Genius," as Gay Hendricks describes in his book, The Big Leap. So, as a fun game, which Ronnie was good-spiritedly open to, I proposed as my contribution to the weekend feasts to buy the ingredients for our two breakfasts with the proviso that Ronnie wouldn't know what I was buying. I would simply buy whatever looked good at the Seaview Market that morning, with no thought as to how the ingredients could come together, and Ronnie's challenge would be to create exquisite dishes out of the groceries.
Needles to say, he was up for it! In the blink of an eye, we were all devouring ricotta-stuffed ciabatta French toast with blueberries and warm maple syrup, a mere day after the mushroom, ham, onion and swiss cheese frittata, so light and fluffy, it practically floated away! I started thinking, I have to talk to the producers who optioned City Rock about this as a possible TV reality show. "STUMP CHEF RONNIE!"
Anyway, folks, I just thought I would share this experience of love and creativity.
Below is a repost of an article I wrote a while ago called "Full Permission Eating."
Salut!
According to two recent studies, red wine will help you live longer and sugar won't kill you even if you're diabetic. Woah! For real?
From one of the articles:
"Two large studies involving more than 21,000 people found that people with Type 2 diabetes had no reduction in their risk of heart attacks and strokes and no reduction in their death rate if they rigorously controlled their blood sugar levels."
And from the other:
"Red wine may be much more potent than was thought in extending human lifespan."
What gives? Well, the bottom line, if you want to skip ahead, is this: what promotes good health and longevity, first and foremost, are happiness and pleasure.
A psychology professor at the University of Pennsylvania, Dr. Paul Rozin, who specializes in, yes, the psychology of food, conducted a survey in America, France, Belgium and Japan in an effort to explain what is referred to as the "French Paradox." The paradox is basically this: the French consume a diet that is very rich and high in fat, yet they have a low rate of obesity and enjoy generally good health, compared to Americans.
Americans, on the other hand, are obsessed with counting calories and cholesterol levels and worry excessively about the effects of food on their bodies, and still, they have a very high rate of obesity comparatively and suffer with more health problems. Dr. Rozin’s survey suggests that the determining factor may be the different cultural attitudes towards food and pleasure.
Rozin is quoted in the journal "Appetite" as saying, "There is a sense among Americans that food is as much a poison as it is a nutrient, and that eating is almost as dangerous as not eating." He goes on to say that "…when a major aspect of life becomes a stress and source of substantial worry, as opposed to pleasure, effects might be seen in both cardiovascular and immune systems." Rozin’s researcher found that the French, on the other hand, of whom only 4 percent follow diets in line with the American recommended guidelines for fat intake, associate eating more with pleasure than with health.
In a related story, the New York Times ran an article in its "Eating Well" column, by Marian Burros, that quoted two professors on nutrition and obesity extolling the virtues and health benefits of enjoying such luscious holiday foods as foie gras, caviar and pumpkin pie, believe it or not! Listen to this:
"Tucked in between the cholesterol and the saturated fat, the calories and the salt in the foie gras, the sausage stuffing and the standing rib roast, there are dozens of nutrients that are highly recommended by the food police. These are the vitamins and minerals and phytochemicals that may prevent cancer and heart disease and a host of other diseases. Everyone already knows that chocolate is a health food: Two pounds of it, particularly dark chocolate, has the same cancer-fighting antioxidants as a quart of tea. But did you know that each time you eat a three-ounce piece of pumpkin pie you may well be reducing your risk of cataracts and macular degeneration? The pumpkin in that small wedge of pie is filled with carotenoids, almost 3,000 micrograms of beta carotene, 1,900 of alpha carotene and 400 of lutein, the carotenoid connected with cataract prevention."
Where is this leading us? Well, the Times also printed an article on Dr. Rozin’s study entitled, "If It Feels Good, Eat It." People will be up in arms perhaps at the suggestion that eating what we want, what we really enjoy, is a reasonable guideline for a diet, yet that is precisely the message of these studies, and it is in keeping with the conceptual foundation of Full Permission Living which is that human beings, if allowed to follow their undistorted desires, will naturally do what’s best for themselves and others without resorting to excess and without having to sacrifice pleasure. Furthermore, if one engages in any activity, including eating, with a spirit of enjoyment and gratitude, it is the premise of FPL that what you take in will benefit you. That may be the original reason for saying a blessing before a meal - to get your mind and digestive system into a positive and receptive mode to aid absorption and facilitate nourishment.
I’ve often thought about the movie, "Michael", in this regard. John Travolta plays the archangel by the same name, and in the film the high-order angelic character is seen consuming huge amounts of sugar, drinking beer, smoking cigarettes and of course, dancing and cavorting with women. I asked myself when I first saw the movie, could such a spiritual being actually indulge himself in that manner and not suffer any negative consequences? Absolutely, I realized. Such a being would be so connected to his spiritual self, so full of joy and gratitude that whatever molecules he took into his body would immediately be transmuted into good nourishment. After all, everything is made of the same basic particles of energy, whether it’s steamed organic broccoli or a hamburger! So what determines the effect of various foods on the body? It must be the individual’s state of consciousness, one’s inner beliefs and attitudes. Indeed, my own grandfather, "Pete", lived without major illness until he died of old age at 91, and he regularly consumed sugar and salt, smoked cigarettes and drank alcohol until the end. How did he do it? Well, for one thing, he rarely indulged in anything to excess, but also, no matter what doctors, the media or younger worried family members said to him, he genuinely never believed these things would harm him. So, perhaps that is why they didn’t. He also rejected stressful behavior as a requirement for being successful, even though he had his own business to run which he did for almost four decades. I never saw Grandpa Pete anxiously rushing around or fretting about anything.
Now, let me issue a qualifier here - none of us is Michael the Archangel and most of us are not, in our hyper-vigilant, type-A culture, Grandpa Pete! Most of us are harboring hidden self-destructive or fearful beliefs and attitudes, and so will unconsciously use food and anything else to create suffering for ourselves if we're not conscious. So the "undistorted desires" part is crucial to living with full permission. Furthermore, if you believe that certain things are harmful to your health, you can’t trick yourself by superimposing another belief over that one and expect not to have disastrous results. How you feel about yourself and your body is a key element that must be brought into conscious awareness in order to be a "healthy hedonist," and the channels to your natural pleasure instinct must be cleared of blockages as well. In other words, a full-spectrum healing process may be needed before you can start indulging in the daily red wine and sweet treats.
Here are some great words of wisdom from Jane Roberts’ "Seth" book, "The Way Toward Health":
"The ideas you have, then, play a large role in the way the body handles its nutrients, and utilizes health and vitality…it is possible for your ideas to cause chemical reactions that impede your body’s ability to accept nourishment. If you believe that the body is evil, the purest health food diet may do you little good at all, while if you have a healthy desire and respect for your physical body, a diet of TV dinners and even fast foods may well keep you healthy and nourished. If we are talking about health, it is to your beliefs that we must look. It is up to you to form a body of beliefs that is worthy of your physical image – for you are nourished by your beliefs, and those beliefs can cause your daily bread to add to your vitality, or add to your cares and stress."
P.S. - A friend and FPL reader recently asked me why I don't include physical movement among the joys and pleasures of life, alongside sex and eating, which I so often speak about. I'm working on it. Stay tuned...
TODAY'S DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSION HEADLINE!
HEADLINE: THE WORLD HAS NEVER SEEN SUCH A DISASTER
ISLAMABAD, Pakistan — U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon said Sunday he has never seen anything like the flood disaster in Pakistan after surveying the devastation and urged foreign donors to speed up assistance to the 20 million people affected.
ISLAMABAD, Pakistan — U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon said Sunday he has never seen anything like the flood disaster in Pakistan after surveying the devastation and urged foreign donors to speed up assistance to the 20 million people affected.
TODAY'S COURAGEOUS QUOTE!
"For the Pentagon to be making threatening demands for censorship of a press organization is a cause for concern, not just for the press but for the Pentagon itself."
Julian Assange (WIKILEAKS founder on the release of secret documents demonstrating what a disaster the war in Afghanistan has been)
Julian Assange (WIKILEAKS founder on the release of secret documents demonstrating what a disaster the war in Afghanistan has been)
TODAY'S QUOTE! (IN DEFENSE OF MARRIAGE?! PART 2)
“Of course, the ideal scenario for parenting is obviously two parents of a mature age, but for those who’ve not yet found their Bill O’Reilly, I’m just glad science has provided a few other options.”
Jennifer Aniston
Jennifer Aniston
"ANONYMOUS" ASKS PL A HUMOROUS QUESTION!/PL RESPONDS!
Here's anonymous:
"What will happen to narcissists in the fourth dimension?"
Here's PL:
Not to worry. There won't be any.
"What will happen to narcissists in the fourth dimension?"
Here's PL:
Not to worry. There won't be any.
THE DEADLY SIDE OF THE WAVE!
DON'T BELIEVE MAINSTREAM DOCTORS!
How many times to I have to say this? (HERE'S a few places where I, in fact, do say it!) Mainstream medical establishment doctors are at the lower vibrational end of the 3D spectrum, meaning that even in the world of linear, dualistic separation, even in the heaviest and slowest of vibrations, they are dysfunctional. They do not know anything about what constitutes true healing, nor do they really care to know, and they work first for profit and the profits and dictates for and from insurance companies, not for your health and well-being.
HERE'S yet another example.
Whew!
HERE'S yet another example.
Whew!
REPOST: "Bohemian Rhapsody!"
Remember the ending to Queen's classic operatic rock song, "Bohemian Rhapsody?" Freddie Mercury sounds almost relieved when he sings the final lyrics: "Nothing really matters, anyone can see, nothing really matters, nothing really matters to me."
The interesting thing is that one can relate to those words as a manifestation of depression, or as an expression of Buddhist-like non-attachment. In the case of depression, the expression is one of resignation and defeat, a place of giving up; in the case of non-attachment, the words describe an enlightened state of mind, a place of letting go.
This led me to having a very powerful discussion this morning with someone about why we struggle with the things we do, and why things "matter" so much, and why do we get stuck when things matter too much?
Well, think about this - the first definition of matter in my computer's dictionary is: "physical substance in general, as distinct from mind and spirit."
Physical as distinct from mind and spirit. Right. Matter is the heavy stuff that stuff is made of. Matter is the super slow vibration of energy that gives things "weight."
Here's another definition of matter from my dictionary: "the reason for distress or a problem."
Ha! Okay, so put the two definitions together and we have an insight here: Matter is "a physical, non-spiritual substance that causes distress and problems."
Now, translate the common question "What's the matter?" into "What's the non-spiritual substance causing me (you) distress?"
Hmm... Is it money, your house or apartment, your body? What are you attached to in a way that matters so much to you that you are becoming "heavy" in the truest sense of the word? And in that heaviness, making you less able to move and evolve your life in more in flexible, creative ways.
Back to Queen and Freddie Mercury - "Nothing really matters?" Your job, your love partner, your kids, your cellulite? Doesn't matter? None of it? Doesn't matter? Can that be so? Can anyone live in such a way and still function and be responsible?
Well, now we're back to Full Permission Living and the movement towards discovering that you can trust your first nature, embodied in your five senses and your intuition. This is how animals in the wild live, following their inner guidance without projections into the future or ruminations on the past. They are exquisitely in the Now, fully in the present moment. Human beings tend to only experience that blissful place where nothing matters when they're in the throws of a powerful orgasm, or in deep mediation or sleep, or in the "zone" during a creative moment. And unfortunately, how often do we allow ourselves to be in those places?
Perhaps an valuable exercise to conduct would be to examine your life and ask yourself what you would be doing if nothing mattered. Pretend you just found out that you only had a certain number of months to live, if you're still operating from 3-dimensional reality. Or suppose you just discovered that you're going to live forever, apropos of 4th Dimensional reality.
What would you do differently than you are now? Write it down. This is a good exercise because it puts you in touch with how precious a gift your life is. Would you be living where you're living now? Working where you're working? Would you love your loved ones more openly? Have more fun? More sex? Go ahead - write it down, and then... ask yourself why you're not doing those things now? Really. And what would happen - really - if you did do those things now? Let me know. I'd love to hear what you discover.
TODAY'S QUOTE! (IN DEFENSE OF MARRIAGE?!)
"What we think of as 'traditional marriage' is not universal. The default family arrangement in many cultures, modern as well as ancient, has been polygamy, not monogamy. The default mode of child-rearing is often communal, rather than two parents nurturing their biological children."
ROSS DOUTHAT (Conservative columnist for the NY Times today in an essay supporting traditional marriage)
HUH?!!?
ROSS DOUTHAT (Conservative columnist for the NY Times today in an essay supporting traditional marriage)
HUH?!!?
NO VITAMINS IN "VITAMINWATER?"
Coca-Cola is being sued by a non-profit public interest group, on the grounds that the company's vitaminwater products make unwarranted health claims. No surprise there. But how do you think the company is defending itself?
In a staggering feat of twisted logic, lawyers for Coca-Cola are defending the lawsuit by asserting that "no consumer could reasonably be misled into thinking vitaminwater was a healthy beverage."
Does this mean that you'd have to be an unreasonable person to think that a product named "vitaminwater," a product that has been heavily and aggressively marketed as a healthy beverage, actually had health benefits?
Actually, if you believe anything that a corporation, a doctor, a cop, a politician or a priest tells you, without checking it out yourself through your own research, then you are indeed already drinking the Vitaminwater.
STILL MORE AND MORE ON THE DAMAGE CAUSED BY SEXUAL REPRESSION!
I have written many posts on this blog about the ways in which sexual repression does severe damage to every aspect of our individual and collective lives.
Well, today, there's a story in Politics Daily with this not surprising news:
A national survey in 2001 of more than 2,500 Christian religious leaders conducted by Duke Divinity School showed that 76 percent of Christian clergy were either overweight or obese, 15 percentage points higher than for the general U.S. population. And other research has shown that clergy across all faiths are succumbing to higher rates of obesity, hypertension, diabetes, and other ailments than their congregants.
Okay?
Well, today, there's a story in Politics Daily with this not surprising news:
A national survey in 2001 of more than 2,500 Christian religious leaders conducted by Duke Divinity School showed that 76 percent of Christian clergy were either overweight or obese, 15 percentage points higher than for the general U.S. population. And other research has shown that clergy across all faiths are succumbing to higher rates of obesity, hypertension, diabetes, and other ailments than their congregants.
Okay?
Today's Quote!
"I refuse to be anti-gay. I refuse to be anti-feminist. I refuse to be anti-artificial birth control. I refuse to be anti-Democrat. I refuse to be anti-secular humanism. I refuse to be anti-science. I refuse to be anti-life. In the name of Christ, I quit Christianity and being Christian. Amen."
Anne Rice (famous author of the Vampire Chronicles)
[Note:My friend Steve and I were such fans of Anne Rice's vampire books that we were inspired one year to take a trip to New Orleans to see the settings of her most famous novels.]
Anne Rice (famous author of the Vampire Chronicles)
[Note:My friend Steve and I were such fans of Anne Rice's vampire books that we were inspired one year to take a trip to New Orleans to see the settings of her most famous novels.]
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