Here's L56:

"Texas Seceding? Uh… OK.

Generally I try to be patient, and understanding of my conservative
friends out there. I like to think that most of the time their crazy
ideas are misguided at best, sometimes just a result of identity
politics. But this one about Texas Seceding, I just have to come out
and say it: this is just plain stupid. Not just stupid stupid but it’s
actually a stupid move for them.

If you don’t know what I’m talking about, there’s a clip of Glen Beck
and Greta Van Susteren riling up a crowd outside of the Alamo from one
of Wednesday’s “Tea Parties”. Protesting the outrageous early ‘90s tax
rates that we’re all “suffering” through right now. Mr. Beck manages
to get the crowd to start chanting “Secede” referring to the idea of
Texas seceding from the union that Texas Governor, Rick Perry,
recently said was a possibility. I’ll also point out that Mr. Beck
manages to identify some people in the crowd who are not from Texas.
So apparently there are conservatives that don’t live in Texas that
like the idea of Texas seceding.

Governor Perry also claimed that when Texas entered the union in 1845
it “was with the understanding that it could pull out”. The correct
version is that Texas retained the right to divide into four different
states, not the right to secede.

Besides not realizing that it’s not actually legal for Texas to
secede, here’s what really boggles my mind - nobody thought of the
political consequences of a Texas secession!!!

Electoral College. Duh. Unless I’m mistaken, I don’t think Texas will
ever vote for a democratic president - even if his name was Jesus
Christ. Take away the electoral college votes from Texas in the 2000
election, and you get President Gore. Even Kerry’s pathetic showing in
2004 would have been only one electoral vote shy of a tie. (Although
it would have been moot because Gore would have been the incumbent not
Bush). If Texas secedes from the union it will be almost impossible
for a Republican to take office.

The Senate. Republicans hold 41 seats in a 100 seat senate right now
(41%). Take away Texas’ two Republican senators, Republicans hold 39
out of 98 (39.8%) – they lose their filibuster.

So why would any conservative (not from Texas) think it’s a good idea
for Texas to secede?

Here’s the kicker, if Texas were to take the option of dividing into 4
different states they would gain 6 senate seats!!!! There probably
wouldn’t be much of an effect on electoral college votes as they would
most likely be divided somewhat equally. But, duh!!! If they really
want a more conservative country, they would divide. But apparently
the cry of “Secede” and “Independence Now” sounds much more patriotic
than, “Divide!” But isn’t that just the Republican way? Sound-bite
over substance or logic any day of the week and twice on Sunday.

So the bottom line, Texas secedes = the whole country moves to the
left, Texans have their independence and they can cut taxes and
contently watch their infrastructure, education and social programs
all crumble right before their very eyes. Good for us. Not so good for
them. But they’re the stupid ones (and I’m not being condescending
here, they’d actually be stupid to do this) that want it, so… whatever…
As for me, give me the word, and I’ll happily start sewing the first
49 star flag.

Posted with my apologies to my few liberal friends hailing from the
Lone Star state."

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